


All You Are Is All I Need

by Gothic_Lolita



Category: Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Bucky Barnes, Canon-Typical Violence, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Hurt Tony Stark, Hydra (Marvel), I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Self-Harm, Teen!Tony, The Avengers Exist, The Starks Are Still Alive, Tony Has Issues, Tony-centric, Why Did I Write This?, reasons, winteriron
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-10-11
Packaged: 2018-12-08 17:28:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 26,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11651316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gothic_Lolita/pseuds/Gothic_Lolita
Summary: Tony Stark is a teenager living in the shadow of his abusive father, who happens to be in close ties with with the government agency SHIELD and the Avengers. When Tony finds out about HYDRA's Project Winter Soldier, and is brushed off when he tries to bring it to authorities, Tony decides to take matters in his own hands. Tony goes off to Russia, alone and virtually unarmed, to find and free the Winter Soldier. And for better or worse, Tony finds more than he could've ever possibly imagined.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm here with another work in progress, long, Tony Stark fic! Okay, so basically a WinterIron AU, where Tony is a teenager while the rest of the Avengers exist (who will consist of Captain America, Black Widow, Hawkeye, Thor, Scarlet Witch, and Black Panther because I said so), and Howard and Maria Stark never got killed because fuck you. Tony is 17, Bucky is mid 20s, and I'm not sure where this idea came from. Read tags for warnings. I tried very hard to nail character personalities, because as people pointed out, I made them a bit OOC in You Deserve Love, And You'll Get It. ALSO TRIGGER WARNING IN CHAPTER 1 I ALMOST FORGOT AGH

Tony sighed. He sat on the couch in one of SHIELD's glorified waiting rooms. He was waiting for Howard to be done with the meeting he was in. He hated the way SHIELD kissed his father's ass, because of his funding and technological contributions. Sure, SHIELD was great, it had the Avengers, and was the only real line of defense the government had when a world-wide crisis like Loki arose. But Tony just found it rather ridiculous how they fucking worshipped his father. It didn't help that he knew Captain freaking America, and the two were just so chummy. That coupled with the money and genius, had SHIELD at Howard's beck and call. Tony found it disgusting that none of the agents here had any idea how awful of a man Howard truly was.

A door into the room swung open and good ol' Steve Rogers walked in. God, how Tony loathed him. All throughout Tony's childhood, all he ever heard was how perfect the Captain was, how his father was friends with the man, and how Tony was nothing compared to fucking Steve. And when they went and pulled the hero out of the ice, that made it worse. Because now Howard could show Tony how perfect Steve was, and how flawed he was in comparison.

Steve caught sight of Tony and smiled warmly. "Hey, Anthony right?"

"Tony." He corrected, trying not to show his hatred, the last thing he needed was the patriot going to Howard about how Tony was rude to him. He didn't look up from his phone in his hand.

Steve nodded. "Tony. Right." He sat down next to Tony, and Tony held back a scowl. "I'm just waiting for your father, I want to ask him to try to get claw marks out of my shield. I mean, he made it, so who better to ask?" Tony grunted in reply, and the stupid blonde kept talking. "You know, it's so strange to me." Steve said with a chuckle. "Howard, my friend, now is a father, with a son almost as old as I remember Howard. You're sixteen, seventeen, right? How's school?" Steve was clearly trying to initiate polite conversation.

Tony flicked his eyes over to Steve, them looked back to his phone. "Seventeen. And I don't go. I graduated MIT when I was fifteen."

Steve let out a whistle. "Smart, just like your dad." Tony was disgusted that Steve dared to phrase that as a compliment. No one should be honored to be compared to Howard Stark.

"Yeah, whatever." Tony ground out, holding back a snide remark.

Steve laughed. "Howard did say you had an attitude. I think he's going a bit tough on you, you are just a kid." Steve said wistfully, and Tony was positive he wanted to mutilate Captain America if he was right about the tone having pity in it.

Tony slammed his phone down on the table in front of him, and looked Steve Rogers dead in the eyes. Consequences be damned, he was no coward to say what he thought. Tony was a fucking Stark, for god's sake.

"You know, you can cut the fucking act with me. I don't bother with formalities." Tony snarled. "Why don't you fucking show any weakness? You know a lot of people would  _ **kill**_  to see you fall, myself included." Tony shook his head and laughed bitterly. "But no, you're America's fucking golden boy, the hero." Tony sneered. "How the hell are you an accurate representation of America? You were just some kid from Brooklyn who was lucky enough to be a part of an experiment that didn't kill you. And suddenly the world loves you." Tony stood up, pacing with anger. "You don't represent the American dream, working hard to earn what you get. No, you got  _ **lucky.**_ " Tony snapped.

Steve looked like someone had just hit him. "Tony... I'm sorry. I... why do you hate me? I'm sorry if I offend you, somehow. Just explain it to me. Maybe I can fix it." Steve coaxed, with a gentle tone.

Tony laughed. "Yeah, you offend me alright. You offend me by fucking  _ **existing.**_  You wanna know why? I may not know you personally, but god I can't go a day without thinking about you. Without Howard comparing me to  _ **you**_." Tony fought to keep his voice vile, so that it didn't show pain. "My whole fucking childhood I was the fuck-up. I couldn't do anything right, still can't. I was constantly told how much of a fuck-up I was by Howard, your  _ **best fucking buddy**_. Because I wasn't you. All I ever heard was how I wasn't like you, ' _why can't you be more like Steve Rogers?_ '" Tony mocked his father's tone. "So yeah, I hate you, with every bone in my fucking worthless body. And yeah, maybe it's unfair to you, but it sure as hell isn't fair to  _ **me**_." Tony felt his voice shaking, the tears threatening to fall.

Tony could see the pity and pain in the Captain's eyes. Steve opened his mouth to say something, but seemed at a loss for words. Tony shook his head and smiled bitterly. He knew Rogers would probably tell Howard what he said, but it was worth it. Tony plunked down on the couch, now sprawled across it, and grabbed his phone, going back on it.

The door that led to the conference room swung open and SHIELD agents, including Howard, spilled out, talking and laughing.

Howard caught sight of Steve and immediately approached the man. "Steve! How are you?" He greeted cheerfully.

Steve glanced at Tony for a moment, but plastered on a smile and turned to Howard. "I'm great, Howard. I was just having some nice conversation with Tony while waiting for you." He said. Tony snorted. Huh, looks the Captain wasn't going to rat out his meltdown. Interesting.

Howard let out a noise of disdain at the mention of his son. "My apologies, I know Tony can be... a brat, quite frankly. I hope he hasn't left a bad impression on you of what Stark men are." Howard said with a tight smile.

Tony glanced up, not moving. He saw the frown in Steve's eyes, and the disgust in Howard's. Tony rolled his eyes and pushed himself to his feet.

"Oh no, Tony is a great kid. I definitely see potential in him." Steve said with a smile. Tony wanted to punch him.

Howard snorted. "Trust me, you don't know Anthony the way I do." He smiled. "Now what was it that you were waiting for me for?"

"Oh right!" Steve remembered. "See, my shield got a bit banged up, and I was hoping you-" Howard cut him off.

"Of course, I'd love to fix your shield. Just bring it into my shop anytime!" He said cheerfully.

Steve smiled. "Thank you." He checked the clock. "I hate to leave so soon, but I have an Avengers meeting."

Howard nodded. "Of course, don't let me stop you." He chuckled then turned away to speak to other SHIELD agents.

Steve paused before leaving, and he turned to Tony. "You're not worthless." He whispered, so Howard couldn't hear it. "I mean it, don't let Howard dim your spark, Tony." Steve smiled at him.

Tony shook his head. "I never had a spark, Captain." He said coldly. Steve frowned at him, but walked out of the room without another word.

After more pointless chatter, Howard turned to Tony and dragged his son out of the SHIELD headquarters and into the private limousine that was to drive them back to Stark Manor. As soon as they were secluded in the walls of the sleek car Howard slapped Tony, who flinched and kept his head turned away in shame.

"You do not  _ **ever**_  speak to Steve Rogers, do you understand me?" Howard was livid. "You do not have the right to talk to someone as good as  _ **Captain America**_! You'll risk tarnishing the Stark name with your idiocy." Howard snarled.

"He spoke to me first." Tony whispered, his voice small and pained. He was past trying to fight his father with defiance and snark.

Howard slapped Tony again, this time hard enough for the ring on Howard's hand to leave the coloration of a bruise forming on Tony's left cheek. " _ **I. Don't. Care.**_  I don't want excuses from you, I raised you better than that."

 _You hardly even raised me, you asshat._  Tony thought coldly. He didn't dare say it out loud. Instead he just glared at the floor of the car and held back tears.

" _ **No talking to Steve Rogers**_." Howard repeated, his voice a low growl. Tony didn't respond, so Howard grabbed Tony's throat, lighting squeezing. "Do you understand?" He almost yelled.

Tony felt his heart pounding in his chest as he tried not to gasp for air, as it would show weakness. "Yes, I understand." Tony said quickly.

Howard narrowed his eyes, squeezing tighter. "Yes...?" He prompted.

Tony swallowed. "Yes, sir." He whispered. Howard released him. Tony almost cried with relief when he saw their car pull into the driveway of the Stark household. Tony barely even waited for the car to stop before bursting out of it, running into the house, and up to his room as fast as he could manage.

Tony slammed his door shut, locking it. He then leaned against the wood, and let his back slowly slide down it, like a movie cliche.

_You'll risk tarnishing the Stark name with your idiocy._

_I raised you better than that._

_Tony can be a brat, quite frankly._

_You do not have the right to talk to someone as good as Captain America._

Howard's words spun in Tony's head, as if a sick record stuck on repeat, tearing him apart from the inside out.

_You'll risk tarnishing the Stark name with your idiocy._

_I raised you better than that._

_Tony can be a brat, quite frankly._

_You do not have the right to talk to someone as good as Captain America._

Tony gasped for breath, remembering Howard's hand on his throat.

_You'll tarnish the Stark name._

_Raised you better._

_Brat._

_No right to talk to Captain America._

Tony felt hot tears slide down his face. He was shaking, gasping desperately for air that wouldn't seem to come. He clawed at his chest and throat desperately. His brain was hot wired to do nothing but remind him how much of a fuckup he was as he shook and sobbed. He wasn't a good enough son. Wasn't a good enough person. Tony wanted to scream, but he couldn't even whimper. He was stuck in his own head, and he didn't even have a way out.

Tony stumbled to his feet, and ran into his private bathroom, shutting and locking the door for good measure. He stumbled over to the sink above the mirror.

He looked at himself for a moment, staring into his own brown eyes. _Fucking disgusting._  A voice in his head hissed.

Tony threw open the drawer beneath the sink, and rummaged around, pushing random bathroom objects aside until he found what he was looking for. Tony sighed shakily and pulled out his best friend. Tony slammed the drawer shut. He pushed up the white sleeve covering his left arm. 

Time seemed to finally slow down when the first cut dug through Tony's flesh. He closed his eyes and felt his pounding heart finally slow as the pain engulfed his wrist. 

A second cut. The pounding voice of Howard slowly receded.

A third cut. Tony could finally breath evenly.

A fourth. Tony stopped shaking.

Fifth. Tony felt the pain burning his wrist, but he wasn't repulsed by it. 

Sixth. The pain was sweet, it was a beautiful relief.

Seventh. Tony put the blade down. 

He opened his eyes. The sink, the razor, and Tony's wrist were painted red. Tony stared for just a bit, enjoying how gruesomely handsome the sight was. God, he was fucked up.

After letting the moment of twisted peace sink into his bones, Tony monotonously cleaned up his own blood. He put the razor away, wiped the sink down, and wrapped his arm in bandages. It was going to be another week of long sleeves for Tony Stark.

Tony walked back into his bedroom. He checked the time. It was six, about dinner time. But he knew with his father's anger at him, he wouldn't risk leaving his room, not tonight.

He turned off the lights and fell into bed. He didn't bother to change, didn't bother to even take off his shoes. Tony let the fingers of exhaustion grip him, feeling emptiness gnawing at his being as he drifted off to a cold sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh fyi, I don't do chapter summaries. They're haaaard. Ain't nobody got time for that.

Tony woke up with a groan. He checked the time. It was nine am. Normally he woke up later, but normally he didn't fall asleep at six pm. He dragged himself out of bed, took a quick shower, got dressed, and headed for the kitchen.

He stumbled into the room, and put a pot of personal coffee on. He went to open the fridge, but froze at a familiar voice.

"Seriously Howard, thank you so much for fixing the shield, it means a lot to me."

Howard's laugh filled the space. "It's no trouble, just helping however I can."

Tony turned, and saw his father and Steve Rogers walk past the kitchen. Howard didn't notice Tony, thankfully, but Steve did. 

"Howard, do you mind if I grab something to eat?" Steve asked. Tony closed his eyes and wished the coffee would brew faster.

"Of course! Take anything you want, the cupboards should have enough food to feed a supersoldier, I hope. I'll get headed to my shop with the shield, met me there when you're ready."

Tony faced away from the entrance he knew Steve was walking in from. He glared at the coffee pot.

"Hey, Tony." Tony ignored him.

"Tony." The voice was louder, closer. Tony ignored Steve, starting to pour the finally finished coffee.

A hand landed on Tony's shoulder and the teen screamed and spilled coffee all over the counter.

"Shit, shit,  _ **shit**_!" Tony swore, trying to clean up the mess with paper towels that were sitting on the counter as well.

"I'm sorry, Tony. Here, let me help." Steve said, trying to help with the mess. Tony ignored him and cleaned up the coffee himself. So much for his caffeine.

"Tony, come on. Say something." Steve prodded, his voice sounding sad and wounded.

"I'm not allowed to speak to you." Tony forced out, his voice clipped. He still wouldn't look at the super soldier.

"Why?" Steve begged.

Tony spun around to face him. "Why don't you fucking ask Howard?" He snarled.

Steve reached up and touched Tony's cheek. "Tony, what happened to you face?"

The teen snapped his head away from Steve's hand. He internally swore, remembering the bruise from Howard's ring. "It's nothing. Just an accident from some machine I was trying to build."

Captain America didn't look convinced. "Are you sure?"

Tony rolled his eyes. "No, Rogers. I'm completely clueless to how I injured myself." His voice dripped with sarcasm.

Steve took a deep breath. "Did Howard-" He stopped talking when he saw the raw hatred, anger, and pain in Tony's eyes when he even started to ask. It was the only answer Steve needed to know the truth, and they both were well aware of that.

The Captain sighed and ran a hand through his perfect blonde hair. "I hate knowing how he treats you, you know. I wish so badly I could do something about it. You're a good person, Tony. I can see it in you. You can do good for this world, you just have to try. See the potential in yourself, and someday you could save the world. I wish Howard didn't keep you from seeing that."

Tony laughed coldly and shook his head. "You don't even know me." He said, his voice frozen over with ice colder than what had once encased Steve Rogers. Tony didn't give Steve a chance to respond before running back into his room.

Tony plunked down into his desk chair and booted up his personal computer. He had nothing to do, it was a Saturday, so Howard wouldn't drag him to SHIELD to ' _learn about how SHIELD works and learn what good people look like_ '. He idly clicked around on his computer. He didn't know what he really planned on doing with his computer, but he was sure could find  _ **something**_  to amuse him.

He dicked around in SHIELD databases for a bit, but it was boring, he had hacked his way to full access to the databases years ago. He only kept doing it to stay recent on what SHIELD was up to, just because he was nosy like that.

He sighed. Tony spun his chair around a few times, hating the boredom that was festering inside of him. He had ideas that he wanted to carry out, but he didn't have access to a shop, and he sure as hell wouldn't work in the same place Howard did. Being a genius could be painfully hard, but being a bored genius was even _ **worse**_.

He stared at the computer screen again. He skimmed through some SHIELD report. Something something something, boring boring boring, mission report, HYDRA, more boring.

The genius tilted his head to the side and smirked. HYDRA. Wouldn't it be fun to hack into their databases? Hell, maybe he could even learn some interesting things in the process.

Tony's fingers flew across the keyboard. He worked quickly, enjoying the thrill of hacking into fucking HYDRA. He was mildly impressed by their firewalls, they were even better than SHIELD (making Tony wonder whether or not HYDRA had hacked SHIELD. He filed the thought away for another time). But within ten minutes, Tony had full access.

Tony smiled triumphantly. It amused him to think about how pissed off HYDRA would be to know that a cocky seventeen year old had hacked into their system and was now walking around in it like he owned it.

Tony read some reports and files, none that were too interesting, considering Tony had read the same things, just from a different point of view, in SHIELD files. One file however, looked particularly interesting and Tony pulled it up.

Project Winter Soldier. Tony read about it with interest. Apparently HYDRA was taking people, brainwashing and torturing them, turning them into vicious assassins, and keeping them in cryogenic chambers when not in use to make them practically immortal.

It was disturbing, but morbidly brilliant, Tony couldn't deny. He read some more about the project, and learned that while there were several Winter Soldiers, only one was still alive, and it seemed to be the original one at that. Tony skimmed about this Winter Soldier until he found a name. His stomach dropped.

There had to be a mistake. The teen read more files on the Winter Soldier, and paled. It added up. 1942, found frozen and almost dead in Russia. Tony couldn't believe it, his mind couldn't comprehend it. The Winter Soldier was James Buchanan Barnes. 

Tony's eyes were wide with shock. He just couldn't fucking comprehend it. HYDRA had found James 'Bucky' Barnes, and made him into a ruthless killing machine. Bucky Barnes, Captain America's best friend and sidekick, was now the Winter Soldier.

Before he even knew it, he had his phone in his hand and was dialing a number. James Rhodes, a senior SHIELD agent that Tony knew and got along with quite well. Rhodey was one of Tony's few, if not his only, friend. Tony anxiously waited for the agent to pick up.

"Tony!" The voice crackled through. "Hey, Tones, to what do-"

Tony didn't hesitate to cut his friend off. "Rhodey, hey, look I have big news. So I hacked into HYDRA to see what all the fuss was about and-" Tony was talking fast, but his friend still managed to cut him off.

"Tony, you hacked into HYDRA?!"

Tony sighed. "Yes, that's not the important part, I-" Rhodey cut him off again.

"Tony, you can't be talking about HYDRA _ **over the phone**_!" Rhodey hissed.

"This is a private line, Rhodey. Now would you listen to-"

"Look Tony, your father is a smart man, he can make a line private, but not unhackable."

The teen scoffed. "Howard didn't make the firewall, _ **I**_  did. Now would you listen to me?!"

Rhodey sighed. "Alright, fine. This better be good, Tones."

"It is, it is. So like I said hacked into HYDRA, was looking around, and found something called Project Winter Soldier. Anyhow, I looked into it, and SHIELD needs to know about this." Tony rambled quickly.

"Tony, SHIELD already knows about Winter Soldier." Rhodey said softly.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Do they know the Winter Soldier is James Buchanan Barnes?" He demanded.

"Yes."

Tony paused, slightly surprised. "So what are they doing about it?" He asked finally, slightly deflated that his big find was already known.

Another sigh from Rhodey. "Nothing, as of now."

Tony frowned. " _ **Nothing**_?" He demanded.

"Look, Tones. I understand your concern, I do. But SHIELD has more immediate threats. And the Winter Soldier is dangerous, any attempts to save him would risk agents lives, and no one wants that. There's nothing to do about it. It's just too difficult of a situation to approach." Rhodey worded carefully.

Tony was livid. "Oh, so in other words SHIELD has better things to do?" He snapped.

Rhodey winced. "Tony, it's not like that."

The young genius scoffed. "Oh really? Because there's a man, who happens to be Steve Rogers'  _ **best friend**_ , being brainwashed and forced to kill people and do other awful things for fucking HYDRA, but no, SHIELD has  ** _better things to do_**  than help him." Tony snapped.

"Tony, it's not-"

"Does Rogers even fucking  _ **know**_?!" Tony demanded.

A long pause. "No, he doesn't. And you are not permitted to tell him." Rhodey ordered, using his SHIELD voice.

Tony felt anger boil in his chest. "Because you know he would drop everything to go help his friend." He said coldly. Rhodey started to say yes, but Tony kept going. "Well good to know  _ **someone**_  in SHIELD has enough of a conscience that they would do the right thing." Tony hung up and threw his phone at the wall.

He felt like crying. Wasn't SHIELD supposed to be the good guys? Weren't they supposed to protect the innocent? Save the world? How could Tony have faith in them for ignoring this? An innocent man was being used, and forced to hurt other innocent people. Bucky Barnes had fought side by side with Captain America, both in and out of battle. He didn't deserve this.

_You're a good person, Tony. I can see it in you. You can do good for this world, you just have to try. See the potential in yourself, and someday you could save the world._

Steve's words rang in Tony's head. Tony stood still, breathing hard. Was Steve right? Could he really do good? There was only one way to know. The best way to see if a hypothesis is correct, is to test it.

Tony's mind started racing. He needed... stuff. He snapped his fingers and ran out of his room.

He ran so fast he almost ran straight past the room he needed. Tony looked down the hall both ways, feeling like some sort of bad spy, before he slipped into his father's study.

Tony closed and locked the door behind him. He ran over to the wall of books Howard owned.

"Alright, you've been a pretty shitty dad, but let's see if you can redeem yourself." Tony muttered. He searched, then snapped his fingers. "Bingo." He yanked a book off the shelves and then ran around to his father's desk.

"Honestly Howard, you are so predictable." Tony muttered as he hit a secret button and typed in a passcode. He really felt like a spy now. He turned around and watched the false wall slid back, to reveal a room-sized safe.

His father kept many safes, everywhere. He even had a few at SHIELD. But this one had what Tony wanted. Cash. But not American currency. Thankfully, Howard kept every currency imaginable here, so Tony was able to grab the one he wanted, grab as big of a stack of it as he dared, grabbed the book, and then run out of Howard's study, closing the safe and leaving everything the way he found it.

Tony dashed back to his room. He threw the money and book onto his bed. The teenager threw open his closet. He searched for a few things, easily finding all of them. A black, sleek backpack, some clothes, and some of his little pet projects of tech. Oh, and a gun he stole from SHIELD. He threw all of them on his bed. He ran into the bathroom, grabbed a small first-aid kit, and almost ran out. He paused, swore, then threw his razor into the kit, just in case, and threw the kit into the pile.

Tony rushed back over to his computer. He made sure to use his personal computer, the one that had more firewalls than SHIELD and would make even Howard weep. He found an empty flash drive, and filled it with every shred of information on the Winter Soldier from both HYDRA and SHIELD within ten minutes. He tossed that on his bed as well. His computer and it's cord went on the bed also. He considered his phone, then decided it would be too risky. But just in case, he grabbed one of his old phones, and it's cord, and threw them into the pile. He could reconfigure the system into what would only be used for emergencies, but would be usable.

Tony paused, thinking. What else, what else, what else. He snapped his fingers.

Tony flew into the kitchen so fast he made a maid scream. He ignored her. The eccentric teen grabbed a reusable water bottle, and filled it. He threw the cupboards open. He grabbed power bars, granola bars, a box of poptarts, and some trail mix. He threw them all into a plastic bag with his water bottle and headed out.

"Don't tell me you're going to do one of those damned inventing binges like your father does! They last days, and you need sleep, you're a growing boy!" The maid exclaimed.

Tony turned, and offered her a mad grin. "When inspiration strikes, you gotta do what you gotta do." He ran away, not bothering to even see her reaction.

Tony slammed his door shut, and stopped for a moment, breathing. Alright, he could do this. He forced himself to slow down a bit. He didn't need to waste excess energy, here.

He grabbed the bag. It was already empty. Good. First went the laptop. He would need it to hack into things when necessary and just have it as a piece of tech. Then his clothes. A pair of black pants, a black long sleeved shirt, black socks, grey underwear, and a black hoodie. He wanted dark clothes to blend in, and knew he would be gone enough to want a change of clothes. He carefully folded them and pushed them into the bag. Next, came the book. An English to Russian dictionary, the smallest one he could find. He didn't know Russian, so it was going to be needed. Next, the money. Russian rubles, he ad no idea their worth, but American dollars wouldn't help. He pushed the bundled stacks in next to the book. The first-aid kit was slid in next to the book as well. Injures were not only possible, but probable for this trip. The gun from SHIELD went into the bags front pocket. He didn't want a gun, but he knew it was going to be useful. The old phone and cords went in the front pocket with the gun. The phone to call anyone if things went very south, and the chargers were obvious. The water bottle was slid into the side pocket and secured in. A few power bars were put in the other side pocket and secured in, and the rest of the food went into the main pocket. This was going to be a long trip, and snacks never hurt.

Tony grabbed his tech projects. One looked like nothing more than a watch, but was a shadow of a big project Tony had been mentally building. When used, it created an armor like metal glove gauntlet over his hand, that held in it tiny missiles and a repulsor he had designed. He slipped the watch onto his right hand. Next was a ring. A ring that when activated caused an explosion that could level a building. He slipped the ring onto his left middle finger. Then, a little device that looked like a car key fob, but had many great buttons. One button emitted a noise that was deafeningly high pitched and disorienting. Another button sent out an energy wave that would cause a blackout of all power sources in a mile radius. A third button turned it into a mini cell tower, giving service and wifi. And the final button turned it into a bomb, just like the ring. Tony really hoped he wouldn't have to use the final button, he spent a long time building it. He slid the device into his pants pocket. Next was a simple-enough looking key. A key that could reconfigure itself to unlock any lock. Tony slid that into his pocket with the fake fob. Lastly, were a pair of glasses that had x-ray vision, heat vision, infrared vision, along with a few others. They looked like lightly tinted shades, but were designed to stay on Tony's head no matter what. Tony put them on.

Finally, Tony picked up the flash drive. It was everything he knew, the entire mission and reasoning. Tony took off a metal chain necklace that held a pair of dog tags, Rhodey's tags from his military days. He had given it them to Tony as a symbol of friendship, to show he cared for the kid. Tony gently unhooked the chain and slid the flash drive onto it and the tags off of it. He pulled the necklace back on, tucking it under his shirt.

Tony stared at the tags. James Rhodes. A man who fought for what was right, for the good of humanity to protect the innocent. Or at least Tony had thought. He threw the tags onto the floor. James Rhodes was a stranger to the teenager.

Tony took off his sneakers and pulled on his black boots. His sneakers were more dynamic, but boots more practical. He grabbed his leather winter coat. It was thin and lightweight, but damn, it was warm.

He threw the jacket over his shoulder, and pulled the bag into his back. He walked out of his room, not bothering to look back. He wasn't sentimental about this place, and he had what he needed.

He jogged down the stairs, headed for the door. No one was around to watch Tony Stark leave. Tony grabbed one of Howard's cars. He wasn't even thinking anymore, just acting. He drove the car away from Stark Manor, still not looking back.

Tony drove fast, but made sure not too fast, so he wasn't pulled over. He got to the private airport, and grabbed his things, throwing the coat into the now stuffed bag, for now.

With thanks to it being private, this airport lacked the buzz of a public one, and was used only by the very important, or the very rich. Most were both. Here, you didn't wait in lines, or go through customs. Here people waited for you, and gave you the plane keys without batting an eye.

Tony walked over to the desk clerk, and offered her an award winning smile, one he learned from Howard Stark himself.

"Hey sweetheart. Could I have the keys to the Patriot?" Tony asked in a sweet voice. The Patriot was one of Howard's privately own jets, the smallest of them.

The clerk typed on a computer. "Sorry, but that jet is privately owned by the Starks. Not open use." She said coldly.

Tony smirked at her. "And don't you recognize a Stark when you see one, honey?" He teased.

She finally looked up at Tony, and instantly recognized him, paling. "Oh my god, Tony Stark. I-I am so sorry! Please, forgive me, I didn't-"

Tony cut her off. "Don't worry about it, doll." He winked.

Despite the fact that Tony was a minor, and she was at least mid thirties, she still blushed at the wink.

She rummaged around in the desk, then pulled out a set of keys and handed them to Tony. "You're not planning on flying it yourself, are you?" She asked as a concerned afterthought.

Tony laughed. "I may be Howard Stark's son, but I _ **am**_ seventeen. So I don't know how to fly a jet, as  _ **shocking**_  as it may be." He joked with a light tone. "So no, I wouldn't dare fly that thing. I'm just waiting for my old man to show up, and a pilot." He lied.

The women laughed at Tony's jokes. "Where are you going? Nothing is scheduled." She asked. Damned nosy woman.

Tony leaned forward and lowered his voice. "Can I tell you a secret?" He grinned. "I have no idea. Old man is dragging me to some business thing, I don't know. I wasn't really paying attention, he can get boring. But you know, I'm the heir and all that, gotta learn the ropes. Or something like that." Tony grinned even more.

The woman laughed again. "Of course. Go right ahead, Mr. Stark. I'll have the jet brought out to the runway as soon as possible."

Tony winked at her once more, then walked off to the runway. He stood there, waiting for the jet to roll out. Once it did, Tony smiled to the man and got into the pilot's seat of the jet.

Tony took a deep breath. He put the keys into the jet. Rhodes really was going to regret showing Tony how to fly a jet when he was fifteen. Tony put his hands on the steering, then tilted his head back, looking up.

"I'm not doing this to prove I'm a good person. I'm not doing this to prove everyone wrong. I'm a fuckup, and I probably won't come back alive. There's no changing that, no changing how people will see the worthless Tony Stark." He whispered to no one, feeling a tear slip. "I'm doing this to right a wrong that SHIELD won't, that everyone else ignores. I can't save the world, Steve Rogers. But maybe I can save James Barnes."

Tony punched coordinates into the jet. Then finally, finally he looked back. And he didn't feel wistful or pained. He only felt more sure. Tony lifted off the jet.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, now we're getting the ball rolling! Time for some action!

Tony felt his heart pounding. It was a mix of everything, really. Fear, excitement, exhilaration, determination, anger. Every emotion that fueled this mission, really. He took a deep breath. 

This was a bad idea. Ah awful, horrid, completely idiotic idea. Tony was aware of that. He hadn't thought it out, hadn't considered all factors, calculated the risks. It wasn't a really a plan. The word 'plan' would entail Tony had details worked out, that he knew what he was doing. Simply put, he didn't. He just had an idea, to save Bucky Barnes.

Maybe deep down, it was a death wish. Or perhaps Tony had actually gone insane. He was known for being spontaneous, but this was a whole different level. Normal people didn't fly to Russia without telling a soul to break into HYDRA when they were seventeen and completely untrained in espionage. But then again, Tony was hardly normal.

But Tony had to admit it, he felt alive. He was free, he could finally break away from rules set by everyone around him. He wished he was leaving something meaningful behind, but very little had been in his past. Tony didn't have many people he cared about, or cared about him. His father was abusive, his mother was absent, his supposed friend Rhodey wasn't the man Tony thought he was. Sure, Tony had a couple other people. Edwin Jarvis, the family butler, was nice. But in the end, he was too formal with Tony because of his occupation, and it made bonding hard. Tony's friend, Virginia 'Pepper' Potts, was amazing in every respect. His only real friend close to his age. But recently, they... just had drifted. There had been a vicious fight, and Pepper had said they should take a break. It hurt, but it wasn't unexpected. Tony knew he deserved it.

In the end, Tony knew why he was really doing this. It wasn't to prove himself to anyone. It wasn't to spite anyone. It wasn't for the thrill. It was for the escape. Even if against all odds, Tony succeeded and things went back to the usual when he came back, he would at least have the memory of knowing he had escaped it all. And Tony couldn't ignore knowing that nothing would be done about Bucky Barnes. He just couldn't. Before he had never had a reason to go on heroic missions, because he rested assure that SHIELD could and would do that. The Avengers saved the world. It was common sense. But SHIELD was ignoring the Winter Soldier for no reason. Rhodey had given Tony excuses, and Tony honestly couldn't see a real reason that would preserve his view of SHIELD being good, no matter how hard he tried. So he wasn't trying to be a hero. He didn't want glory. He didn't need acceptance. He wasn't a savior, regardless of if he succeeded or not. No, he was just a kid who needed to escape, and finally had a reason to.

Tony didn't really think much beyond that during the flight, which was a relief. His mind usually raced with ideas and thoughts at a rate most people couldn't keep up with. It gave him headaches some days, when he couldn't silence the endless thoughts cycling through his head. He had found ways to slow them, most harmful. Drinking when he could steal something alcoholic from Howard was nice. Cutting had been his latest coping method, and was very effective. Working also helped, when he got so caught up in an invention or idea that he tuned everything else out. Beyond that, there wasn't much to slow Tony' head down, so he was grateful for it.

 

* * *

 

It was hours of mental silence and the roar of a jet engine before Tony landed the jet on Russian soil, surrounded by the landscape of forests and mountains in the distance.

Tony wasn't stupid enough to land close enough to the HYDRA base that he would be noticed in his touchdown, but he wasn't so far away that it would take for to make his way there.

He reached inside of his bag, and pulled on the leather coat. He slung the bag onto his back, slid the jet keys into his pocket, and got out.

The frigid Russian winter hit made Tony swear. January probably wasn't the best time to fly to Russia, he figured. Well it was too late to fix that.

Tony pulled his old phone out of his bag. After powering it up, getting it connected to some sweet wifi (via fake car fob), Tony pulled up a GPS. 

He was a solid twenty miles from the HYDRA base. With a car, he could make it in no time, which of course posed his first challenge. Find a damned car.

Tony hiked out of the forest, finding a road that was a mile away from the jet. He knew that it was wishful thinking to think he would get the jet back. Once HYDRA realized Tony had gotten into their base (once he managed to do that), they would most probably find the jet and destroy it. Not that Tony cared, it was Howard's jet, after all.

Tony considered his options. He could try hitch hiking. Which probably wasn't a good idea, considering he didn't know Russian, and asking for a ride to a secret base of a terrorist base was a fatal idea. He would have to steal a car if he wanted a ride. 

The road was clearly a back road, and Tony watched as a cars only appeared once about every five minutes while he thought about how to get to the base. How exactly was he supposed to steal a moving car? Even if he could, his conscience would protest stealing a car from a random person and leaving them on the road. 

Then something happened that had to be a fucking gift from above. A black, armored car slowly slid across the pavement. A car with the HYDRA symbol painted on it's side. Motherfucking bingo.

Without thinking, Tony ran in front of the car, waving his arms like he was in distress, praying that even HYDRA agents weren't crazy and heartless enough to run a teenager over. Tires screeched to a halt and Tony almost sang with joy.

A man dressed like a soldier got out, screaming at Tony in Russian. Tony pulled out his fake key fob and hit the button that emitted the ear piercing noise, protecting his own ears and pointing it at the HYDRA agent.

The HYDRA lackie screamed and covered his ears. Tony ran to the car, jumping in the driver's seat and slamming on the gas pedal before he even had the door shut. The HYDRA agent, shockingly didn't like that very much. He pulled out a gun and and started firing at Tony.

"Oh now come on, I can't die now, I seriously just got here. That would make all my training from shitty spy movies be in vain." Tony muttered, flooring it hard, doing a sharp U-turn so he was at least headed in the right direction.

He almost ran the HYDRA guy over, and found that to be amusing in itself. He was thankful that the car was armored and the guy didn't seem smart enough to aim for a tire. Maybe for once Tony actually had some higher power  _ **not**_  taking an eternal shit on him.

Tony eventually slowed down to a normal speed when he was a safe distance from the man whom he stole the car from. Double score, would be a lot easier to break into HYDRA with a HYDRA car. This had to be the literal definition of luck.

Tony's heart pounded in his chest. He couldn't believe he was doing this. Sure, it was once thing to steal a jet and fly it around on what could've been seen as a joy ride. But this, there was no coming back from this. He was in a fucking HYDRA car that he fucking stole from a HYDRA agent, and oh fucking god there was no coming back from this.

Tony held back vomit from spewing across the dash.  _Come on, Tones. Hold your shit together._

When the HYDRA base came into view, a surge of confidence hit Tony. He could do this. He was Tony motherfucking Stark. This would be fucking cake.

_Act like you own the place, you're only a zebra in a herd of horses if you let your stripes show._

Tony shifted, as to look comfortable and at complete ease as he drove the car into the HYDRA base. He parked the car alongside other HYDRA vehicles.

Tony wasn't really sure what he had expected. A place like SHIELD, maybe, where people were always milling around, the tone seemed like a friendly office building, with the occasional explosion and/or dismemberment. Normal, to Tony.

What HYDRA was... was like some freaky dungeon bunker thing in a shitty medieval-era movie. Tony didn't know places like this actually existed. It was concerning.

There weren't any agents around, and Tony half wondered if the place was actually still used. He was about to get out to search, when another HYDRA vehicle drove in.

Tony swore and slunk in his seat to avoid being seen. A man walked out of the car and walked to the building, shoulders square,  footsteps even and calculated. Tony used a zoom-in feature on his special glasses and watched the HYDRA lackie.

The man came up to the steel walls, typed in a passcode that Tony watched and memorized, causing the doors to open and the man walked in, then the doors slid shut again.

Tony took a deep breath and cracked his neck. _Walk in like you own the place._

Tony slid out of the car, mimicking the way the agent had. He used the same even and calculated footsteps, shoulders squared. When he got to the door, he didn't hesitate with the passcode, but didn't rush it. He acted as if this was natural, like he owned the goddamned place.

Once Tony was inside he slid his hand inside of his pocket. "Lights outs." He whispered, and pressed the blackout button.

He flicked his glasses onto night vision, and quietly forged forward, freezing and pressing himself against the wall if he heard or saw someone.

There was shouting in Russian, and soldiers bumbling around, walking into walls, each other, and just about everything else. Thanks to the thick walls, it was pitch black without the lights. Tony smirked. Being the only one who could actually  _ **see**_ , he literally felt like he  ** _owned the goddamned place_** , walking down the halls like he would anywhere else.

Tony turned down carefully remembered corridors, hoping his memory wouldn't fail him now. He probably should've looked over the blueprints of this place a bit more. 

Tony stopped in front of a door he knew was what he wanted. "Bingo." His voice was barely audible, even to himself.

Without any power, the door opened like any other. The sound was masked by the idiotic HYDRA men around him, trying to get their power back. _Good luck, the prototype had Stark Mansion dark for weeks._ He thought smugly.

Without power, the cryogenic chamber had already thawed Bucky Barnes. Tony had made sure the Winter Soldier wasn't on a mission. He wasn't  _ **that**_  stupid.

Tony looked over his shoulder without thinking. God, he really needed to stop watching spy movies. It was like he expected Ernst Stavro Blofeld to be standing behind him or something. He shook himself a bit, loosening his muscles.

He opened the chamber door. A gust of cold air blasted Tony in the face, in a very climactic, would-make-a-great-movie-reveal way. Tony braced himself slightly, half expecting Barnes to jump out and body slam him, or something. No such happened. The Winter Soldier remained perfectly still. He was a wall of muscle, a metal arm, brown hair that reached past his chin, and a scruffy start of a beard. Tony had to admit, it was fucking hot, in a you-might-as-well-enjoy-my-face-because-it's-the-last-thing-you'll-ever-see way.

Tony took a deep breath, and braced himself. He grabbed the Winter Soldier's lifeless arm and wrapped it around his shoulders, then took a step forward. As soon as Barnes' full weight fell onto him, Tony swore out loud in Italian.  _ **Fuck**_. That was  _ **not**_  a good idea. That was in fact probably his  _ **worst**_ idea yet, Tony thought, his knees buckling.

 _Come **on** , Tones. You're on your own. Stop being the worthless piece of shit you are long enough to actually get something fucking down. _The voice in Tony's head snarled at him.

Tony felt a fire light inside of him. He started dragging Bucky Barnes out of the room. He got to the doorway, and felt winded. He wanted to collapse. Bucky had to weigh  _ **at least**_ three times what he did.

 _Worthless, worthless, worthless, worthless. Howard's right. Piece of shit, a shame to the Stark name. Are you going to fucking let Howard be right?_ Tony was half sure he was delirious now, maybe he actually _ **had**_  gone insane. Either way, the self loathing voice in his head gave him strength.

The fire inside of him burned even hotter. Tony growled and dragged James Barnes through the HYDRA corridors. The voice pounded in his head, but it did more good than harm. In a way it wasn't even loathing. It was really encouragement, in the most twisted, yet most helpful way.

_Prove him fucking **wrong.**  Can you do it, you piece of shit? Come on, even  **you** 're better than this._

Tony ignored the bumbling HYDRA men around him, ignored the burn in his muscles. It was almost painfully hilarious, for Tony to just be dragging the Winter Soldier out of HYDRA without them even noticing. He smirked and shook his head. His idiotic idea was fucking working.

Tony got to the steel doors. This posed a problem, If he opened the doors, they would see him, with the Winter Soldier over his shoulders. Tony pulled out the fake fob. 

"I seriously hope this doesn't wake you up, Sleeping Beauty." He muttered, then slammed his finger down on the ear piercing button. He used Bucky's arm to block his own ears. He heard what he assumed was Russian cursing all around him, and smirked again. He opened the doors, got Barnes out, and closed the door.

"Stay here. I'll bring the car to you." Tony ordered the unconscious man, with a pointed finger.

Tony ran as fast as he could to the car he had used before. He climbed into the driver's seat, and sped back over to his unconscious friend. Tony opened the passenger door.

It probably looked comical, like some cheap cartoon scene, but using his own leverage, creative angles, and determination, he forced Barnes into the passenger seat and slammed the door shut triumphantly. He wouldn't offer himself a moment to breath, considering it was seconds before HYDRA came out of the building. Tony ran around the car and jumped back into the driver's seat.

He smirked, and floored it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Real talk, who caught the James Bond reference?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Bucky POV! Finally, Bucky! Also, translations are Google Translate, and we all know how that goes. Don't kill me native speakers. Please.

Bucky jerked awake. His heart thundered in his chest. He was awake, and he could remember, they were going to put him in the chair again, god they were going to fucking-

Wait. Bucky sat up and looked around. That in itself was confusing, he always woke up in the chair, not lying down. Was he dreaming? He looked around. He was in some room that looked broken down, like someone had found an abandon building and just thrown Bucky into it. Was he on a HYDRA mission and had snapped out of the Winter Soldier somehow? That didn't make sense. He remembered every single one of his missions, and none of them could fit this. What the hell was this.

"Oh hey, you finally-" Bucky snapped around and grabbed whoever was speaking and threw them at the wall without thinking.

He lept to his feet, facing the person whom he had just thrown.

"Owww. That....  ** _fuck_**... hurt." The person groaned out.

"Who are you? Where am I? How did I get here? Who do you work for? What's going on?" Bucky growled, a flurry of questions passing his lips as he watched the guy he had thrown sharply.

"If...  ** _ugh_**... you'd give me a fuckin' second.... I can answer all that... just... damn... lemme catch m'fucking breath." The guy said pushing himself on all fours while panting.

Bucky watched him for any sudden moves, arms folded and eyes narrowed.

The guy pushed himself to his feet once he could breath properly, and flinched when Bucky growled at him. Bucky looked up and down him, not being able to stop his brain from assessing the guy. Young, had to be in his teens. Small stature, little muscle, would be easy to subdue if needed. 

The guy held up his hands, as if surrendering. "Hey now, no need to get all worked up, compadre." The guy said, his voice slightly nervous, but with an easy tone. "Anyhow, if you promise not to chuck me into the freaking wall again, I can explain."

Bucky took a deep breath. "Talk. Now." He ordered.

The guy nodded. "Okay, talking, I'm talking. My name is Tony, Tony Stark. Nice to meet you, and all that. Anyhow, I can promise you I am ** _not_** the bad guy, and I don't work for anyone. I'm a lone wolf, you know, all that." He winked and smirked. "Anyways, what was I saying? Right, not the bad guy. I broke you out of HYDRA. We're in some abandoned building in Moscow. I've been waiting for you to wake up before going anywhere else because quite frankly you are really heavy, and hard to carry. Do you know how hard it was to get you into a damned car? Seriously, that was probably the hardest part. I break into fucking HYDRA, and the real struggle is forcing an unconscious Bucky Barnes into the getaway car. You would not-" He rambled, so Bucky cut him off. 

"How do you know my real name?" He whispered softly. It had been so long since someone had called him Bucky. He couldn't ignore the emotion he felt when the guy- Tony- called him Bucky Barnes. Not Soldier, Bucky.

Tony looked startled. "Hm? Oh, I hacked into HYDRA. That's how I found out about Project Winter Soldier in the first place."

Tony seemed to be very nonchalant about being able to hack into HYDRA. Bucky filed that information away for further questioning. "Why? Why would you break into HYDRA to break me out?" Bucky asked, still giving Tony a suspicious look.

That question got a frustrated sigh from Tony. "Because SHIELD knew, they fucking  ** _knew_** , and they wouldn't do a damned thing. You... it's not your damned fault HYDRA did this to you! You fucking  ** _deserved_**  to be helped, and SHIELD didn't give a fuck!" He ranted angrily.

Bucky blinked. Seeing Tony's rage at SHIELD supposedly not helping him, it was clear to Bucky that no matter the circumstances, the kid had his heart in the right place. He clearly just wanted to help Bucky, for whatever reason.

"So you decided to break me out of HYDRA?" Bucky asked carefully. "Who helped you?"

Tony smirked. "Yep, I did. And no one, I told you, lone wolf. Pay attention."

Bucky folded his arms. "You expect me to believe that you -a what, sixteen year old?- broke into HYDRA singlehandedly?" He asked, his voice doubtful.

The teen rolled his eyes and scoffed. "I'm seventeen, first of all. And second of all, yes, because I did. I'm a genius, you know."

Something clicked. "Wait, you said Stark, as in Howard-" Bucky finish before Tony cut him off.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Howard Stark, ** _the_** Howard Stark. I'm his son, and all that." He said, and Bucky noted a strong amount of distaste in Tony's voice when he said his father's name.

Bucky didn't doubt the genius that Tony had mentioned. He remembered Howard from the war, and Howard was singlehandedly the smartest guy he had ever met. "This is a bad idea. HYDRA will come for me, and you  ** _will_**  get caught in the crossfire. I have a tracker in my arm, if they haven't come yet, it's because they're probably waiting outside." Bucky warned quietly.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Please. I didn't say I came into this thinking it was a good idea. Also, HYDRA already came looking for you. I used my pure genius to fight them off, naturally. And you  ** _had_**  a tracker in your arm. I took it out and used it to make a trap, a trap that mind you worked perfectly." Tony said, his smirk smug. Bucky saw right through it. Tony wasn't as cocky or egotistical as he tried to come off. He was scared, and worn down.

"How long was I asleep?" He asked.

Tony hummed. "Three days."

Bucky rubbed his temple. "And what have you been doing during these three days?"

"Fighting off HYDRA, watching you to make sure you weren't dead, trying to learn Russian, trying to make an actual plan, you know, the usual." Tony said with a shrug.

"Trying to make an actual plan." Bucky repeated. "You didn't have a plan going into this?"

"No."

Bucky stared at him. "That is-"

"Idiotic? Check. Reckless? Check. Impulsive? Check. A death wish? Check. Insane? Check. But surprisingly working so far? Motherfucking check." Tony smirked deviously.

"You... you're either selflessly brave, or recklessly stupid." Bucky said flatly.

Tony laughed. "I'd like to think of myself as a good mix of both. Probably more of the latter, though." He admitted with a nonchalant shrug.

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm stuck with you, aren't I?" He growled.

Tony shrugged again. "I mean, you could ditch me, if you wanted. HYDRA's already got a price on my head, so it's not like you'll be protecting me or anything. ** _But_** ," Tony's grin grew and became schemingly disturbing. "If you stick with me, with you as the brawn and me as the brains, we could fuck some shit up and kill some evil motherfuckers."  He offered.

Bucky narrowed his eyes. He was still getting used to being Bucky Barnes, not the Winter Soldier. He couldn't trust his own head, and posed a more of a threat to Tony than Tony did to him. The only one in danger of them working together was Tony. Well, both of them if HYDRA got involved, but they wouldn't kill Bucky. They would kill Tony. Bucky didn't like that thought. Tony was annoying, but intriguing and slightly charming, in a stupid way. And he was right, HYDRA had a price on his head regardless of whether or not Bucky decided to stick with him. All risks considered, Tony at least had a fighting chance if Bucky fought beside him.

"I'm a liability. I've had HYDRA in my head for so long... I don't trust myself, with or without HYDRA around. Trusting me with your life... is almost as idiotic breaking me out of HYDRA. But... I'll-how did you put it?- stick with you." Bucky forced out, trying to keep his voice stable and strong. Last thing he needed was Tony thinking the 'muscles' was weak.

Tony grinned. "Fantastic." He paused. "Can I move now, without you throwing me at the wall? Or are we not to that point of the relationship yet?" Tony joked, but it was a serious question.

Bucky nodded. "You're fine, I won't throw you at the wall." He smiled slightly.

"You should smile more, Buckeroo. Looks nice on ya." Tony said absently, walking across the room. Bucky didn't think much of it. With Howard's reputation as a playboy, it wouldn't be surprising to see that trait passed down to Tony as well.

Tony grabbed a black backpack and pulled out a sleek laptop and started typing on it. "I can hack into HYDRA's camera feeds, but it doesn't help that I have no idea what they're saying. Tony looked over his shoulder at Bucky. "Care to translate some footage I found of them talking about me and you? I'd like to know what they're planning, to get the upper hand, and all that." 

Bucky nodded. "Yeah, sure." He walked across the room and stood directly behind Tony, looking over his shoulder at the screen. He took note of how  ** _short_**  Tony was, the kid's head didn't even get past Bucky's biceps.

"Jeez, Buck. Personal space a thing with you, or no?" Tony muttered. Bucky ignored the comment. "Anyhow, be a doll and translate."

Bucky watched as Tony clicked on something, and a video showed up. Seeing the inside of the HYDRA  base made his skin crawl, even on a screen. Two men were being ordered by a higher ranked HYDRA agent. Bucky vaguely recognized their faces.

"Любую дополнительную информацию о местонахождении Зимнего солдата?" ( _any further information on the location of the Winter Soldier?_ ) The higher ranked asked.

"Нет, сэр. Трекер, похоже, скомпрометирован." ( _no sir, the tracker seems to be compromised._ ) One of the soldiers replied nervously.

The first speaker was silent for a moment. "Найти его. Верните его живым." ( _Find him. Bring him back alive._ ) He ordered.

"Да сэр. Что мы делаем с Tony Stark?" ( _Yes sir. What do we do about Tony Stark?_ )

"Приведи его тоже. В живых. HYDRA вербует его, он сделает полезное дополнение к HYDRA." ( _Bring him in as well. Alive. HYDRA will recruit him, he will make a useful addition to HYDRA_.) He ordered.

"Да сэр." ( _Yes sir_.) The soldiers replied. Tony turned the feed off. He gave Bucky an expectant look.

"Long story short, HYDRA is coming after both of us. They want both of us brought in alive.  HYDRA plans to recruit you." Bucky said shortly.

Tony's eyebrows shot up. "Huh. Don't know if I should be flattered or disgusted."

"Terrified is the word I would use." Bucky said flatly.

"Psh, I got you on my side. HYDRA can suck it." Tony sang.

Bucky froze. He heard thundering footsteps. "Buck? You got that creep 'somebody's gonna die' look on your face again." Tony said with question in his voice.

"Get down!" Bucky roared and pulled Tony down just as a smoke bomb crashed through the window.

Tony swore in Italian and quickly shoved his laptop back into his bag, zipping it up and pulling it on. Bucky stood up, throwing Tony over his shoulder (who squealed in surprise) and kicking the door down.

There were at least half a dozen HYDRA agents waiting for them. Bucky held up his metal arm to block bullets and took them out with one arm, his other arm holding Tony. Bucky was able to wrestle a gun away from one of the HYDRA agents, and started dropping them like flies. When he ran out of ammo, he threw the gun at another agent, hitting them hard in the head. 

After flying down flights of stairs, Bucky ran out of the entrance and looked around for an escape route. Normally he could outrun any normal man, but he had a human being slung over his shoulder.

"A car, get a fucking car!" Tony demanded. "Any fucking car, just get a car!"

"A car won't work without keys!" Bucky snapped.

"Yeah, and I can hotwire any automobile on the fucking face of the earth, so keys are irrelevant!"

Bucky didn't bother thinking about that bit of information, and instead ran to the closest door, ripping the door off and shoving Tony into the driver's seat. "You better hurry the fuck up."

He ran around to the passengers side, ripping that door off as well, throwing it at the closest HYDRA agents. He sat down in the seat and turned to Tony, who already had bare wires in his hands, eyes wide with concentration.

Bucky was about to yell at him to hurry the fuck up, when the engine sprung to life. "Bingo." Tony muttered, and floored it.

Bucky swore at how fast Tony was driving, and at what ease Tony did it with. Clearly wasn't the first time the kid floored the gas pedal to see how fast he could make a car go. Bucky growled when he heard the roar of engines speeding after them, too close for comfort. 

Suddenly Bucky got hit in the stomach with Tony's black bag. He wondered how the hell the kid had gotten it off without slowing down. Whatever the hell this kid was made of, it was a hell of a lot more than money and some smarts.

"Gun. Front pocket." Tony growled, not taking his eyes off the road. The tone was deep and almost ** _animalistic_**. Bucky should've been disturbed and worried that such darkness could be pulled from the teen, but he wasn't. He knew Tony would need it if he wanted even a shadow of a chance to fight back against HYDRA. Sometimes you had to fight fire with fire.

Bucky shook off the thoughts and pulled out said gun. He braced himself in the space where the car door used to be, and looked behind them. Three HYDRA vehicles followed them, getting closer by the second. 

Bucky took a deep breath, closing one eye to aim. With three calculated and rapid shots, a tire of each car was blown and they all veered off course and slammed into each other.

Bucky pulled himself back inside the car. Even with the immediate threats subdued, Tony didn't slow down. It was a smart move, considering that they needed the most distance between them and HYDRA as possible.

Bucky didn't know how much time had passed before Tony screeched to a halt in the back alley of some city, hands still gripping the wheel, white knuckled with a wild look in his eyes.

"You good?" Bucky asked, cutting the silence.

Tony looked himself over. "Yeah, yeah I'm good. Not hurt too bad anywhere. You?" He flicked his gaze to Bucky.

"Didn't just mean physically, Tony."

Tony snorted. " ** _You're_**  the one with HYDRA raping your brain, and you're asking me about ** _my_** mental stability?" Tony said sarcastically.

"Tony, you just watched me kill a small army, almost got killed, and have a terrorist organization who wants to kidnap you. You're allowed to say you're not okay." Bucky said softly.

The genius looked him dead in the eyes. " ** _I'm. Fine._** " His voice was a deadly growl. If Bucky were anyone else, he would be pissing himself. But he wasn't.

Bucky didn't push it. "Alright brains, what's your next move?" He asked instead.

Tony pursed his lips. "Are there hotels in Russia?"

Bucky snorted. "It's Russia, not Mars. Though how the hell do you plan on paying for a hotel?"

"Bag."

Bucky furrowed his eyebrows. He opened the main pouch of the bag, and amongst other things worth questioning, he found a considerable amount of rubles. "Tony, you didn't steal these, did you?" He asked his voice concerned.

Tony scoffed. "I wouldn't- well, sort of. But stealing from Howard should hardly count as stealing." 

"Howard as in your father?" Bucky asked.

An eye roll. "No, Howard The fucking Duck." He said sarcastically.

Bucky figured that was some reference to pop culture that went over his head, but he didn't mention it. "Alright then." he mentally noted Tony referring to Howard by his first name. That coupled by the disgust the mention of the teen's father made it obvious Tony didn't have a good relationship with Howard.

Tony pulled out his phone,taping around a bit. "Ah. How convenient. There's a hotel two blocks from us. Only a three star rating, but hey, not like we've got the money to afford a five star." Tony shrugged. "Anything should be a step up from abandoned buildings. I feel like some crappy vigilante." He pouted.

Bucky laughed. Tony scowled further. "What? You haven't laughed once since I met you, what do you now see so funny?"

Bucky shook his head, grinning. "Just... just how sinfully adorable you look when you pout. I'm pretty sure that pout could end wars and bring people to their knees."

Tony Stark positively, without a doubt, blushed. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were hitting on me, Buccaneer." He covered with a snarky grin.

Bucky rolled his eyes. God, it felt so good to smile. It felt good to laugh, to have a moment where he could pretend to be normal.

"Anyhow, we going to the hotel or not, Bucks?" Tony asked.

Bucky nodded. "Lead the way."

Tony grabbed his bag from Bucky's lap. "You may want to put that back in the bag. I know Russians are considered hardcore and all that, but I still think walking around waving a gun around may alarm some." Tony said with a pointed look. Bucky sighed and handed Tony the gun. Tony slid the gun into the bag and slid the bag onto his back.

"You know, normally I don't have to open doors because they're opened for me. but you went the whole extra mile of ripping the door  ** _off_** for me. I'm starting to think you really are hitting on me, Buckeroni." Tony said, his usual smirk resting on his lips as he got out of the car.

"Shut up. And stop with the stupid nicknames."

"Not happening, Barney."

"I hate you."

"Love you too, sweetums."

"I will seriously kill you ** _for_** HYDRA if you don't shut up."

"Weren't you paying attention? HYDRA doesn't want me dead, Barnes and Noble. Also isn't it a bad idea to talk about HYDRA while walking down public streets?"

"I'm not even understanding half of your nicknames or references, just a reminder I'm from the 40s. And most Russians don't speak English."

" ** _Right_**. Well Barney is a purple dinosaur on a kids' show, Barnes and Noble is like the bookstore of supermarkets, oh and Howard The Duck is this  ** _awful_** movie that came out in the eighties. Absolutely awful, don't watch it, it was made by a ** _horrid_** movie company, by the way. No idea what the ** _hell_** Marvel was thinking with that one. And still, it seems all ** _forbidden_**. Like my spy movie training has taught me that we shouldn't be talking about this in public right next to each other, like there should be ear pieces, a code, newspapers, shades, all that jazz."

"You don't ever stop talking, do you? Also, why would a  ** _purple dinosaur_** be on a ** _kids' show_**?"

"No, I don't. And how would I know? Kids' shows are a _ **strange**_  place, no man should venture into that unknown without proper safety measures taken.

"... Proper safety measures?"

"Smoking a blunt, drinking a bottle of Scotch, listening to One Direction, watching football. You know, dumbing yourself down to that level."

"Do you smoke blunts, Tony?"

"Ew, god no. Tried one once, just made everything in my head crazy fast, I thought I was gonna go insane. Ended up slamming my head against the wall until I could knock myself out just to make it stop."

"That... sounds like it would give anyone a massive headache."

"Yep. And a  ** _nasty_**  concussion. Got me out of gym for a couple weeks, guess that was a plus. Oh hey look, here's the hotel."

Bucky was almost... sad that their pointless conversations had been ended by the building in front of them.

"You're doing all the talking here, so try to not come across as a scary as fuck assassin, mkay?" Tony said with a pointed look.

Bucky sighed and nodded. "I'll try."

They walked into the hotel. It wasn't five star quality, but it wasn't trashy. Bucky figured the prices were going to be decent enough.

He walked up the the woman behind the desk, and offered her a smile, remembering what Tony said.

After a brief exchange in Russian, Bucky got them a two bedded room. He almost pissed himself laughing when the clerk raised an eyebrow at the two beds, realizing how incriminating it looked for a man in his twenties, to be booking a room with a teenager who was pretty enough (Bucky wasn't afraid to admit that, Tony was pretty. Sue him) to be a hooker. He booked for two weeks, though he doubted they would get their full two weeks in. He paid, got the key, and led Tony up to their room. 

As soon as they got inside, Bucky burst into laughter. Tony arched an eyebrow. 

"Did you take some shit I don't know about?" He asked.

Bucky shook his head and managed to form words through his snorts. "No... it's just... the woman at the desk... clearly had the idea... that you were a fucking hooker I had hired."

Tony stood completely still, blinking rapidly. "I... I don't really know how to take that." It amused Bucky even further to see Tony speechless. 

"I mean, you do give off that look. Scruffy, but pretty, clothes beat up and tight fitting. Also didn't help that when you opened your bag there was a considerable amount of money." Bucky said with a shit eating grin.

"Scruffy, but  ** _pretty_**?" Tony questioned. "Dear god, why don't you just bend me over the counter right now. Because ** _I'm_**  supposed to be the one with the charming playboy personality, yet so far you've done nothing but flirt with me." Tony said with an amused look.

Bucky's cheeks tinged with embarrassment. "I haven't had sex since 1942. I'm bound to flirt with a fucking lamp post at this point." He covered.

Tony snorted. "Sure, soldier boy. Sure." He glanced over his shoulder, and gave Bucky a quick wink.

Bucky tried not to think about that too much Tony flopped down on one of the beds and groaned. 

"Ugh, pampered billionaire has been away from a nice bed for too long." He moaned, face down into the pillows.

"Three days, Tony. You were away from a bed for three days." Bucky said an eyebrow quirked in amusement.

"Yeah, three days without sleep because I was afraid you would wake up and oh, I don't know, throw me at a wall." Tony rolled over and faced Bucky with a smirk.

Bucky gave Tony a glare that held little heat. "You honestly expected me to wake up in a strange place with no explanation and not react with violence?" Bucky said, giving Tony a look.

Tony sighed. "Touche." Tony sat up, hurling his bag into a chair, sliding off his jacket, and taking off his suit shirt as well, leaving him in a tight white undershirt.

Bucky noticed bandages on Tony's left forearm. "What happened to your arm?"

Tony looked down at his arm, as if surprised by the sight of the bandages, like he had forgotten about the injury himself. "Oh you know, breaking you out of HYDRA, some looney tune with a knife, no biggie." Tony shrugged.

"You're lying." Bucky pointed out, his voice cool and easy, but he narrowed his eyes at the younger.

Tony looked Bucky dead in the eye. "So?"

"So how am I supposed to trust you, if you lie to me?" Bucky questioned, taking a menacing step towards Tony.

Tony offered Bucky a stone cold glare and while keeping deadly eye contact, Tony used his right hand to roughly, yet calculatedly, rip off the bandage. He threw it onto the ground, leaving his arm bare.

Bucky flicked his eyes to the wound. There were seven healing cuts, deep in Tony's wrist. They were going to scar, and Bucky's sharp eyes noticed they wouldn't be the only scars on Tony's wrist. The kid's arm was littered with scars, all similar to the fresh cuts. There was no doubt they had been done deliberately.

"Self harm." Bucky said, keeping his voice void of emotion. He vaguely knew of the practice, a few guys in the military had done it back during the war.

Tony snorted. "Yeah, call it what you want." He said coldly. He turned on his side, facing away from Bucky.

"Why?" Bucky asked. 

"I just fucking met you today. Just because I'll work with you doesn't mean I'm telling you all my deepest secrets, Barnes." It hit Bucky like a low blow. Tony had not only given him the cold shoulder, but actually called him by his birth name. "Wake me up at a reasonable time so I can shower and actually put something like a plan together. For now, I'm going to sleep." Tony said flatly, and didn't say anything further.

Bucky paced. Tony slept, and Bucky paced. He was too attached to the kid already, and he had known him less than twenty four hours. He had been so starved of human companionship that he was well aware of the fact that he would take a bullet for Tony Stark. That wasn't good, the Soldier in him whispered. Bucky hissed and grabbed his head. God, he hated it. Hated having someone else in his head. _Not just your head anymore, Barnes._ The Soldier's voice was his in every sense, but void of... anything. It was a machine, nothing more than a body waiting to carry out orders. Bucky hated it, hated it so much. He couldn't even trust himself.

He paced for hours, his body not used to being awake without having a mission to complete, a course of action to take. He buzzed with excess energy that he had no way of shaking off.

"Papà, no  ** _per favore_**. Mi dispiace, posso fare di meglio." ( _Dad, no **please**. I'm sorry, I can do better._ ) Tony mumbled in his sleep, and started to toss and turn.

Bucky knew Italian, and the words coming out of Tony's mouth concerned him, considering how he already knew Tony had a bad relationship with Howard Stark.

"Posso fare meglio, prometto. Per favore, papà. Non lo farò questa volta. ** _Per favore_**!" ( _I can do better, I promise. Please, dad. I won't screw it up this time. **Please**!_ ) Tony's voice was more distressed, his body starting to tremble.

Tony started thrashing. " ** _Mi dispiace_**. Sono così dispiaciuto. Mi dispiace che sono un cazzo. Per favore, mi dispiace, signore." ( _ **I'm sorry**. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I'm a fuck up. Please, I'm sorry, sir._ ) Tony's voice was so small now, and he was crying, even in his sleep.

"No, non mi colpisci di nuovo. Per favore, mi ** _dispiace_** , io-" ( _No, don't hit me again, please. I'm **sorry** , I'm-_) Bucky was by Tony's side before he even realized it.

Bucky gently shook Tony awake. "Hey, hey Tony. Look at me. Just a dream, right? It's just a dream. You remember where you are? Remember me? Talk to me Tony." Bucky urged, holding the small teen in his arms.

Tony's eyes shot open, and he stared at Bucky with fear painted on his face. He seemed to get a bearing of his surroundings, then buried his face into Bucky's shoulder, sobbing.

"Mi dispiace, mi dispiace, mi dispiace, mi dispiace," Tony chanted like a mantra, his voice thick with emotion.

Bucky froze for a second. He wasn't really good at consoling people. He had done it for Stevie a few times, but even then he felt clueless.  But he couldn't just sit here like an idiot.

Bucky wrapped his metal arm around Tony, and ran his flesh fingers through Tony's soft hair. "Shh, hey, it's okay. You don't need to apologize for a thing, Tony." He soothed. Tony eventually calmed down, but stayed in Bucky's arms. And for just a moment, they both ignored HYDRA, ignored SHIELD, ignored Tony's obvious daddy issues, ignored the world around them. For just  moment, they weren't Tony Stark and the Winter Soldier. They were just two men enjoying each other's company.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pop culture references and nicknames for Bucky are great, two in one is BETTER. Tony would agree. Also, did you catch the meta reference there? Though seriously, don't ever watch Howard The Duck. Weird ass movie. Got a cameo in GOTG though, so I guess that's.... something.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm here and I'm queer! Heya, how are you today? Good, great. This chapter is short, but I end work things the way I want. Mwuahaha.

Tony finally pulled away and let out a shuddered sigh. "I'm gonna go take a shower. See if this place has free breakfast, will you?" Tony said, quickly moving to his feet and grabbing his bag, headed towards the bathroom door.

"So we're not going to talk about that?" Bucky asked carefully.

"Nope." The door slammed shut, and locked.

Bucky ran his fingers through his hair with a sigh. He knew he shouldn't expect full confidentiality from Tony, he literally just met the kid. But after being deprived of true human contact for so long, going so long without being treated like like an actually human being, he was bound to immediately get attached to whoever gave him those simple pleasures. Tony not only treated him as a human, but also had an exuberant personality that would draw anyone in. It terrified Bucky how quickly he had accepted Tony's presence, even  ** _wanted_**  it.  _You'll regret this._  The soldier warned him.  _Shut up._ Bucky thought back.

Bucky sighed and shook off his thoughts. He rummaged around in the drawers a bit, and found a rubber band, which he used to pull his hair up into a messy bun. Using the hotel phone, he called about breakfast, and found out there was breakfast, but it cost more than Bucky figured Tony was willing to spare.

Bucky was slightly surprised by how quickly Tony got out of the shower, but nonetheless, Tony stumbled out of the bathroom drying his hair with a towel. He wore black slacks and a black long sleeved shirt. He was still barefoot.

"You know, I find it a bit concerning that you only manage to look  ** _more_**  terrifying and murder-y with a man bun." Tony pointed out with a raised eyebrow.

Bucky rolled his eyes and ignored the comment. "They don't have free breakfast, by the way."

Tony wrinkled his nose. " _ **Great**_." He said, dragging the word out sarcastically.

"So what's your grand plan, exactly?" Bucky asked, folding his arms.

Tony rubbed the back of his neck. "Still working that one out. HYDRA sort of blew up my jet." He pouted slightly.

Bucky arched an eyebrow. "You have a jet?"

" ** _Had_**." Tony corrected. "And sort of. It was technically Howard's, but I borrowed it."

"Borrowed?" Bucky's lips quirked up.

Tony shrugged. "Well I mean best case scenario, I guess it would've gotten back to Howard." He paused. "Can't say I'm sad to see something of Howard's blown to smithereens, though."

Bucky snorted and shook his head. "So, new plan?"

The genius plopped down on one of the beds, running his fingers through his wet hair. His face was drawn tight with concentration. "Plane tickets would be suicide... HYDRA's gotta be watching every airport known to man for a buff metal armed guy and a teen... we can't exactly  _ **drive**_  to New York..." Tony mumbled, mostly to himself.

"New York?" Bucky asked. "Why New York?"

 Tony looked up, startled. "Because that's where the SHIELD headquarters are. And that's where I live. And that's where the Avengers are." He explained.

Bucky stared at him incredulously. "You think it's a good idea to take the Winter Soldier into SHIELD? Tony, they'll just throw me into prison." Bucky said, muscles tense.

"Not if your best friend has anything to say about it." Tony smirked.

Bucky frowned. "I didn't know we were best friends."

Tony snorted. "I didn't mean  _ **me**_ , Terminator." He rolled his eyes. "Not like I have any pull around SHIELD anyways. I meant your  _ **actual**_  best friend, the good ol' Captain, Steve Rogers." Tony said, a slight disgust in his voice.

"Stevie died in a plane crash. It's on HYDRA files." Bucky ground out flatly. He hated talking about his old friend. It brought back bittersweet memories, that Bucky just couldn't bare to think about, for the sake of his own sanity.

The teen arched an eyebrow. "You have old news. How could you have avoided the whole ordeal where they pulled him out of the ice? It was everywhere, newspapers, tv, seriously, _ **impossible**_ to avoid." Tony thought for a moment. "Unless of course HYDRA purposely kept you shielded from it so you wouldn't find out, and revert back to Bucky Barnes because of it." He mused.

"Tony... what the hell are you talking about?" Bucky growled, his heart speeding up.

Tony paled a bit and flinched away from Bucky. "Okay, I'll slow down a bit. Steve Rogers? He went down in the ice, and was presumed dead. But when they found his plane a few years ago,  they found him too. And when he thawed out, he was alive. The ice preserved him, like the cryogenic chambers HYDRA used for you. Anyhow, he's on a team of superheroes called the Avengers, he's like their leader. And yes, he is very much alive." Tony slowly explained.

Bucky's heart pounded. He stared at Tony, his expression shocked, scared, and confused. "Stevie's alive." He whispered.

Tony nodded. "Here, lemme show you." He grabbed his laptop and set it on the kitchen counter top. He pulled up a video and clicked play. Bucky watched as several people in colorful costumes fought against a hoard of robot-looking things. Tony wasn't lying. Front and center, in the middle of the line of fire, hurling his shield, was Captain America. Bucky's stomach tightened as he watched his best friend fight on the screen.

Bucky felt like he couldn't breath. His best friend, that damned  _ **punk**_ , was  _ **alive**_. Alive and healthy, and leading a team of heroes into battle. And probably risking his life too often. Bucky was gonna kill him.

"Damned punk." He muttered. "Of course he's alive. Only that punk would manage to live through all that come out swinging."

A darkness flickered across Tony's eyes, but it went as quickly as it came. "Well no shit. He's Captain America." Tony snarked.

Bucky rubbed his forehead and sighed. "Alright, fine. So we're going back to SHIELD. That still poses the question, how?"

Tony frowned. "I'm not really sure. I told you, didn't really think it through."

He stared at Tony. "You know for the brains, you aren't braining very well."

The young genius squared his shoulders, standing up straight, and staring Bucky down. "Do you have any ideas then?" He said, raising his eyebrows.

Bucky actually chuckled. "Kid, you don't even come up to my shoulder. If you're trying to be menacing, grow a foot."

Tony pouted. "You're just a brick wall." He shot back.

Bucky arched an eyebrow. "And you're what, four and a half feet tall?"

"I'll have you know, I'm 4'11 on a good day."

"On a good day?"

"You heard me."

"Just admit it Tony. You're abnormally small."

"I'm fun-sized."

"Same difference, pal."

" _ **Pal**_?"

"I'm from the 40s, cut me some slack."

"Sure thing,  _ **pal**_."

"I will dismember you."

"Please, you need me."

"So far, I'm the one who's done most of the work fighting HYDRA."

"Oh really? Because last time I checked, I broke you out of HYDRA, took the tracker out of your arm, kept you safe for three days, you know. Actual productivity, not shooting good."

"'Shooting good'?"

"Well you don't shoot bad."

"I see."

"You know, banter is getting us nowhere."

" _ **You're**_  the one who needs to come up with a brilliant idea."

"I'm working on that." Tony sighed and paced a bit. "Right now, I think it's best to play defense. Just keep running. Once we get the upper hand, we can work out getting to SHIELD. Until then, survive, I guess." Tony flicked his eyes. "Any better ideas?"

Bucky pressed his lips together, thinking. "I mean, it's not the best. But I don't think we have any better options, for now." Tony nodded with agreement.

The teen threw himself onto the bed he had slept in. "So, how does one amuse themselves in Russia?" He asked.

"How the hell would I know?" Bucky asked, raising his eyebrows.

" _ **Right**_." Tony remembered. "Your amazing personality just makes me forget you were a first class assassin." Tony smiled disarmingly.

Bucky rolled his eyes. "I still am. The Winter Soldier is still in my head, Tony. Even without him there, I just proved back there I am more than willing to kill if the situation calls for it." He said, his voice soft.

Tony sighed. "Killjoy, much?" He muttered, but got serious. "Look, when you were killing those guys, you were doing it for your own survival, and mine. They were HYDRA, they deserved it and you know it."

"I was HYDRA." Bucky mumbled.

The genius grabbed his arm. "No, you _ **weren't**_." He said firmly. "The  _ **Winter Soldier**_  was.  _ **You**_ aren't the Winter Soldier. You're James Barnes, the guy who fought next to Captain America in war. You're a good person, Buck. I'm serious." Tony said firmly.

Bucky stared at the teen. Tony's gaze was sincere, and he didn't break eye contact. Bucky wondered how the hell he had gotten so lucky to get 'rescued' by this kid. He wasn't SHIELD, or the government, but god Tony was one hell of a lot more dangerous.

He smiled and shook his head. "If you say so, kid."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I'm going to demonize or humanize Winter Soldier yet, considering I've already depicted him as his own conscious. Hmm


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Whoops, this took over a week to update. Didn't mean for that to happen. I done goofed. Anyhow, here we are with a new chapter! Enjoy.

Tony absently paced in circles. He was bored. Dear  _ **god**_  he was so bored out of his mind he thought his brain might actually leak out of his ears. He stared at Bucky, who just kept looking back and forth between the window and the door.

"How are you  _ **not**_  dying of boredom? Seriously, I almost want HYDRA  to come so there's something to do." He whined.

Bucky's sharp gaze flicked to him. "Don't say that, Tony. And I'm a trained soldier. I've stayed in the exact same position for hours waiting for a target. Right now the only thing annoying me is your whining." He said flatly.

Tony pouted. "Well I'm a genius teenager who's never done this before. I'm bored." He threw himself onto one of the beds.

Bucky shrugged. "Your fault. You came here. How did you amuse yourself, back at home?" Bucky asked.

"Not much. Built stuff from scraps I stole from Howard's shops. Hacked into SHIELD. Pulled pranks during stupid galas I was forced to attend. You should've seen what I did to this French ambassador once. I would be surprised if his suit doesn't still smell like bananas to this day." Tony grinned at the memory.

"Aren't you a joy." Bucky said sarcastically.

Tony flashed him a faux sweet smile. "Only the best, sweetums."

"Ya know if I didn't feel the need t'protect your stupid ass I'da left it in the dust long time ago." Bucky grumbled.

Tony howled with laughter. "Oh my god! Your accent! You sound like you walked right out of an old movie that takes place in Brooklyn." Tony was beside himself.

Bucky didn't find it very funny, and instead looked embarrassed. "Shut up." He said, forcing the Brooklyn accent away, and replacing it with an almost Russian one.

"Oh hey, come on. I was kidding, Buckeroo. It's cute, seriously. You'll sweep some girl off her feet with it." Tony tried to fix, giving Bucky a pleading look. 

"I don't even like gals." Bucky mumbled, looking away.

Tony felt his eyebrows shoot up. "Really? Didn't see you as gay. Not that I'm judging! Just you know, whenever Captain America talks about his old friend Bucky, he tells how you had a trail of girls following you." Tony quickly explained.

Bucky sighed and looked up. "Just 'cause they were followin' didn't mean I wanted 'em to." He sighed, letting the Brooklyn accent bleed through again, to Tony's delight. "Sure, I flirted 'round with some gals, but you didn't do it with gents back then. People didn't like it. Fooled 'round with a few gents when we could get away with it, but mostly just hadda to fake it." Bucky explained spreading his hands.

The teen nodded. "Yeah, I get it. People are better with it now-a-days, but there a still some asshats with their holy books. But most people are generally cool with it. It's even legal in the States. Mother Russia still isn't so hot on it, but hey, take what you can get. I swing both ways myself. Why pick, all people are hot. Howard would have my head if he knew though. Especially if I fell in love with a guy. Probably over some dumbass reason too, like carrying on the family name. Not that I care." Tony rambled.

"You like gents and gals?" Bucky asked, cocking his head to the side. Tony nodded. "Fits you." He said. Bucky was quiet a moment. "What do you wanna do with your life?" Bucky asked, eyes boring into Tony.

Tony shrugged. "I mean, I'm the heir to Stark Industries, so I'll have to take over the company as CEO eventually. Howard wants me to be a SHIELD agent as well, doing both, like him. So the way I see it, I'll spend most of my twenties doing menial things for SHIELD under the label as 'agent', then whenever Howard kicks the bucket I'll spend my life stuck doing business crap for a company I don't really care about." He admitted with a sigh.

Bucky frowned. "Not what I asked. Asked what do  _ **you**_  wanna do." He clarified.

"Don't really have a choice, Buck. Why should it matter?" Tony said flatly.

"If you did?" Bucky pressed.

"Never though about it. I guess doing things like this don't seem too bad. Being a field agent, right in the middle of the action. But I'm not really built for it. Awful at taking orders, not too great at combat, too small to really be menacing, you know. All variable factors that SHIELD would consider." He said with a deep sigh. Admittedly, Tony had thought about these things before, and had come to the conclusion he'd make an awful agent.

Bucky arched an eyebrow. "You're not doin' t'bad with me and HYDRA." The assassin pointed out.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Luck. I've been surviving and keeping you alive by the skin of my teeth. All joking aside, if it weren't for you, I'd probably be dead." Tony admitted, sitting up and hugging his knees.

"And I'd still be some HYDRA lab rat if it weren't for you. Don't underestimate yourself. You'd make a good undercover double agent. Charmin', easy t'like, unpredictable. All good traits 'f an agent." Bucky insisted.

Tony smirked slowly. "Oh I'm charming now?" Bucky's cheeks flushed red. "You know, now that I know that I know you like dudes, I might actually take your flirting to heart." Tony winked.

Bucky scowled at the floor. "Shuddup." He mumbled.

"Aw, come on now. Don't pout, you look too cute."  Tony made a face.

Bucky stopped scowling, and a ghost of a smile flickered across his face. "And here you say I'm th' one flirtin'." Bucky smirked slightly.

Tony grinned. "I'm the son of a playboy. It's in my DNA." He said offhandedly.

"Excuses." 

Tony shifted and sat on his knees, and leaned towards Bucky, getting as close as he dared, so there was about a foot of space between their faces. "Maybe. But do you blame me? You're hot, built like a brick wall, and saved my life. You're my knight with a shining arm." Tony leered, not breaking eye contact. Bucky was breathing harshly, and had an unreadable expression.

"Tony," He started. "You're not even a legal adult. Whatever you're thinking about..." His voice became commanding and firm.

"And if I were? Buckeroo, you're like what, ninety something? I think age is irrelevant." Tony smirked.

"Don't matter, you're not." Bucky put his foot down. Tony scowled slightly, and leaned in closer.

"You're no fun." Tony pouted. He gave the bridge of Bucky's nose a quick lick, then threw himself back into the bed, sprawled out across the pale sheets.

Bucky immediately reached up and rubbed his nose. "The hell was that?" He demanded. Tony shrugged. Bucky's scowl softened a bit, but he still looked a bit pissed.

"You-" Bucky cut himself off, and looked around, shoulders tense. Tony recognized the look as the same one he had the first time HYDRA had come for them. Tony didn't bother to ask, and leapt up, shoving his laptop in his bag and throwing it over his shoulder. Bucky grabbed the gun from the back pocket and cocked it. 

"Stay by me, if you aren't in an arm's length, you're too far." Bucky growled. Tony nodded and stuck to Bucky's side.

They the door was kicked down, and all hell broke loose. There was a volley of bullets, and Bucky pulled him behind the counter-top, shooting back. Tony considered hitting the button on his watch to turn it into a gauntlet, but he figured Bucky just wanted him to stay down.

"желание!" One of the HYDRA agents shouted, and Bucky froze, color draining from his face.

"ржавый!" Tony realized they were Bucky's trigger words, and Bucky kept mumbling 'no', being of little help.

"семнадцать!" Bucky was having a full blown panic attack, shaking and breathing hard. Tony paled when he realized he was going to have to handle this on his own.

"рассвет!" Tony pressed the button on his watch, and red metal and tech sprang out, wrapping around his hand. Tony ripped the gun from Bucky's shaking hands, then stood up, firing.

He pointed his gauntlet at the man shouting the words, blasting him with a repulsor beam, effectively blasting the man through the wall. Tony only managed to shot three bullets until he ran out, and relied on his gauntlet. It was powerful, sure, but there were too many men. Tony was vaguely aware of his own scream of pain as a bullet hit his arm. He came to the acceptance that he had failed Bucky. HYDRA was going to get them, pull them apart. He was going to be brainwashed, and turned into a HYDRA soldier like Bucky. And Bucky. Bucky was going to have to go through it again. Tony felt fear grasp him.

Then Bucky came out from behind the counter, and began to quite literally tear men apart. It was animalistic, he literally crushed skulls with his bare hands and ripped limbs off of them, until the entire room was a bloodbath. Soon enough, Tony and Bucky were the only ones left alive and standing.

"Bucky?" Tony asked timidly, still slightly shaking. The man spun around and faced him, eyes livid, and posture tight. Bucky looked Tony up and down, as if trying to decide if Tony was a threat or not. It dawned on Tony. "Winter Soldier." 

Bucky -no, the  _ **Winter Soldier**_ \- grabbed a gun from one of the dead HYDRA men and pointed it at Tony. Tony held up his hands, knowing that they were shaking.

"Hey, hey, hey. I'm unarmed. I can't hurt you. I promise, I'm on your side. Tony, remember? I want to help." Tony said quickly, trying to keep his voice even. The Winter Soldier only glared harder and flicked his eyes to the gauntlet, then back to Tony's face. "This? Taking it off. I'm taking it off, see?" Tony said, moving slowly as he slid it off of his hand, then tossed it onto the counter, purposely out of his reach to be less of a threat.

"You. Hot-wire car?" The Winter Soldier growled.

Tony nodded. "Yeah. Yes, I can hot-wire a car. Any car you need." He assured. The Winter Soldier snatched up the gauntlet and shoved it in his pocket, then grabbed Tony's arm. Tony was half dragged to the window that had already been broken open. Tony was then thrown over the Winter Soldier's shoulder, and the assassin jumped out of the window and onto the fire escape. It was a blur to Tony, just the world moving around him, as his head spun from blood loss.

Then they stopped in front of a car that the Winter Soldier ripped the door off of. Tony scrambled forward and made quick work of hot-wiring it. It took him a few minutes, considering he could barely see straight, but he got the car working. The teen climbed over to the passengers' side, figuring the older man would want to drive. The Winter Soldier slid in beside Tony, and gunned it. The car flew down the road like some action movie.

Tony didn't bother to check if they were being followed, he figured his companion could handle that. Instead he checked his rapidly bleeding arm. The bullet had gone in one side and came out the other, which had the benefit of a bullet not being in his arm, but the negative effect of two holes he was bleeding from. It didn't seem to have hit bone, but certainly wasn't superficial either. Tony knew he should wrap  _ **something**_  around his arm to stop the bleeding. He knew he should do something. But his arm screamed with pain, and his heart pounded too fast to comprehend anything else. Tony didn't even bother to fight the darkness that blurred his vision. He wasn't strong enough, had no idea what he was doing. And besides, it was probably going to be easier for the Winter Soldier to lug him around if he was unconscious. Hopefully Bucky came back soon enough to tend to his injuries. Tony felt his eyes roll into the back of his head, and let the darkness  sweep over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like it's the biggest writing cop-out ever to end a chapter with someone passing out. So naturally, that's what I did. If it's of any condolence, next chapter will have Winter Soldier pov. *wink wink*


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm here! And as I promised, here's some Winter POV! I was conflicted on how to write him, but I tried to imagine myself in that situation, and just went with it. Enjoy!

The Winter Soldier pressed his foot against the gas pedal. The car flew down the streets. HYDRA tailed them, but no cars came too close to take direct action. He drove, taking methodical turns down streets. He glanced over to the boy. He had passed out. Bullet wound, left bicep. Fatal if not treated. The Winter Soldier scowled. He would be slowed down if he saved the boy. 

The tires screeched as the car slammed to a halt. Abandoned building. Multiple possible exits. Zero threats. He picked up the boy, slung him over his shoulder, then walked into the building. The Winter Soldier found a room and threw the boy onto a table. He tore away the clothing on the boy's upper half. He searched the black bag. First Aid Kit. At least the boy wasn't completely mindless.

The Winter Soldier methodically sewed both the entry and exit wound shut, disinfected it, then bandaged it. He checked the boy's pulse. Weak. Slow. But present. Blood loss was excessive, though survival is the expected outcome. Current state, unconscious. Should be expected to wake in a few hours, if not, should be manually roused.

The Winter Soldier hummed. Eccentric. Unpredictable. Emotional. Prideful. Kind hearted. Strengths include genius level intellect, relentlessness, quick thinking, technical capability, personality. Weaknesses include physical size, lack of combat skills, Howard Stark, self destructiveness, rebellious tendencies. Threat level dependent on situation. Current threat level, very low. The boy was a bit of a confusing situation for the Winter Soldier. No current mission, no forced need to comply, no immediate threat. The entire situation confused him. Why had this boy broken him out? The boy liked James, and James liked the boy, which was a weakness. The boy was a threat to the Winter Soldier by being a weakness to James, however termination of the boy would only further the problem. The boy had been compliant to the Winter Soldier, but he was unpredictable, so nothing was to be assumed.

The Winter Soldier frowned and paced, his eyes scanning the room hazardously. He didn't have a mission. Therefore he had no immediate use. Why was he present then? James hadn't truly been in control since before the Winter Soldier existed, would he not want to keep a strong grip on said control? James was scared of the Winter Soldier, scared of HYDRA, scared of the code words. He supposed that was why James had let him back in control. The Winter Soldier was not afraid. He was tactical, built and bred to fight any enemy. HYDRA did not scare him, but rather controlled him. The Winter Soldier supposed he didn't like being controlled, as it was human nature to feel such, but he had never existed without the claws of HYDRA firmly dug into the fabric of his mind. Therefore he was lost, and confused. And, that, did scare him, slightly.

He continued to pace, his eyes constantly surfing the room for threats. Time passed, though it didn't affect the Winter Soldier. He had waited for days for a target. Time was not a nuisance. Within a few hours, as predicted, the boy woke up with a groan. The Winter Soldier didn't hesitate to pull out the gun and point it at the waking boy.

As soon as the boy saw the gun pointed at him, he held up his shaking hands. "Hey. Winter Soldier. Winter, can I call you that? Can I call you Winter?" The boy asked slowly. The assassin tightened his finger on the trigger and cocked the gun, ignoring the question. The boy paled and started to shake. "Winter. I... I don't want to hurt you, okay? I'm trying to help. I'm Tony, Tony Stark. I don't work for HYDRA or SHIELD, or anyone. I just want to help, okay? You bandaged my arm? Thank you. I-I appreciate that. C-Can you still be nice to me? Put the gun down?" The boy, Tony, asked. His voice was shaking and sounded terrified.

Winter slowly lowered the gun, and the kid almost cried with relief. "Why?" He asked, his voice rough.

Tony frowned slightly. "Why? Why what, Winter?" He asked slowly.

"Why do you want to help?" Winter growled.

Tony nodded. "Ah. Because... I think you're a good person. You can be a good person. I... I want you to be able to be your own person, without HYDRA controlling you." He explained.

Winter frowned. No one had ever wanted to help him before, only use him. Maybe James was right about liking this boy. That didn't mean Winter trusted him however. further analysis was needed. Double agent status was a probability.

"I should kill you." Winter thought out loud.

To Winter's slight surprise, Tony nodded again, face grave. "Probably. I'm a hinderance to your escape, assuming escape is even what you want. It wouldn't be hard. You're a super soldier, and I'm an injured kid. It would probably take you less than two seconds to snap that gun up and shoot me in the head. But... will you?" Tony asked, tilting his head to the side, giving Winter an unreadable look.

Winter tilted his head to the side. That wasn't an expected answer. Tony was expected to beg, most of his victims begged. Tony had shown fear before, but hadn't begged. The boy seemed afraid, but wistful at facing his death. That truly befuddled Winter. What sort of person did not beg for life? Tony was a mystery to Winter, and Winter didn't like that.

"No." Winter growled. The boy was a hinderance, but occasionally helpful. He was also... intriguing. Now that he had the ability to make his own choices, he...  _ **wanted**_  to keep the boy alive. He didn't understand  _ **want**_ or emotions. He was a soldier, not a human being. These things did not belong in his head. Except, it wasn't his head. It was James' head. Winter was the intruder on a man, a human being who did experience emotions. A human who did not deserve the Winter Soldier inside of his head. Winter felt his heart pound. Now that he could think independently, guilt washed over him. _No, you are the Winter Soldier. You do not experience emotion. You were made to comply._ The voices of the scientists and agents who had used him echoed in his mind. Winter let out a cry of pain and clutched his pounding head. This didn't make sense. He was the asset, not a human being. He did not deserve these feelings. But he did not want to go back to how it was before. He did not want to be controlled.

Winter was unaware that he had fallen to his knees, breathing harshly and whimpering, until he felt the boy touch his shoulder. Winter looked up to see Tony on one knee before him, eyes filled with concern.

"Winter?" Tony's voice felt far away. Winter didn't understand. What was happening? He vaguely felt Tony grab Winter's flesh hand and press it against the younger's chest. "Winter, can you feel me breathing? Can you try to match it? Breath with me, Winter. You can do it, I know you can. In and out, nice and slow. Breath with me, Winter. You can do this. Just breath." Tony's voice was calm and soothing, patience radiating from it. Winter grit his teeth, but listened to the boy. It was an order. He could follow orders. Winter knew how to follow orders. He would take orders from Tony.

When Winter had sufficiently calmed down, he slowly felt the world tilt back into focus around him. He blinked a few times, then stared at Tony, who still looked calm and concerned. "What was that?" Winter demanded, his voice small.

Tony offered a tight smile. "It's called a panic attack. They suck, I know, trust me. Your head starts going too fast, and everything is too much, right? Your body doesn't know how to react to the onslaught of fear and chemicals running around in your head, so you start shaking, sweating. It gets hard to breath, and everything shuts down. Your heart pounds, and it feels like you can't breathe. They suck ass, but they don't last forever. Eventually, they end." Tony explained slowly, being patient and caring.

Winter nodded slowly. "Does... everyone have... panic attacks?" He asked slowly.

Tony shook his head. "No, not everyone. A lot of people do though. Mostly people who suffer from an anxiety disorder." He said softly.

"Do you?" Winter asked.

The boy pursed his lips. "Yes, I do." He said, his voice small.

"Why?" Winter asked.

Tony sighed and slowly adjusted himself so he was sitting cross legged on the floor. Winter took this as a social cue to do the same. "A lot of reasons. Normally I'm convinced I'm not good enough, and get scared that I'm just destined to be a failure of a human being. Howard sets me off too, sometimes." Tony admitted.

Winter frowned. "Howard?"

"My father, Howard Stark." Tony explained.

Winter scowled. Weren't fathers supposed to be caring? He didn't know a lot about family, but why would a parent cause their child such pain? Winter didn't like panic attacks. Tony didn't seem to like them either. "Why?" 

Tony frowned, seeming to try to understand the question. "Why does Howard give me panic attacks?" Winter nodded. "Oh. Well, he doesn't mean to. Not that he would really care if he knew I had them, he would just use it as a reason to call me weak." Tony tilted his head back and sighed. "Howard... well, I don't know how much you know about fathers, but Howard isn't a good dad. He constantly tells me I'm not good enough, makes me hate myself. He calls me a coward, says I'm a failure of a human being. He... he hits me sometimes, not badly though. And he chokes me too. But it's not that bad, I mean, it could be worse. Just sometimes after yelling at me or getting physical with me, I run to my room and can't help having a panic attack." Tony sounded uncomfortable talking about it, but still told Winter anyways. Winter wondered why.

"Your father hurts you?" Winter asked, his voice having a slight growl that made Tony flinch.

"Yeah. See the bruise on my cheek? It's from his ring, when he slapped me a few days ago." Tony pointed out. Winter flicked his eyes to the yellowing coloration on Tony's cheek. He didn't stop himself from lifting a hand to brush his fingers over it gently.

"Why do you let him?" Winter growled.

Tony shrugged. "Don't really have a choice, Winter. He's bigger and stronger than me. And even if he wasn't, people see him as a god. He's a SHIELD agent, the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company that he built from the ground. No one would ever believe that Howard Stark would hit or scream at his own son." Tony said, his voice pained.

Winter cupped Tony's cheek. He didn't know the boy very well, but he felt a fierce fire burning inside of him that told him to protect Tony. Maybe James was right. "Who helps you? When you have a panic attack?" Winter asked.

Tony blinked. "No one. I mean, my friend named Pepper who caught me a few times helped, but most of the time I'm on my own." Tony admitted.

"How do you stop?" Winter was confused. He wouldn't have been able to calm down if Tony hadn't helped him. How could Tony manage it?

"Practice. You get used to them. I have coping methods. They aren't entirely healthy, but they work." Tony shrugged.

Winter cocked his head. "What are they?" 

Tony flinched, then held up a shaking left arm. There were cuts dragging across his small forearm. Winter brushed his metal fingers against the angry red lines. "I... hurt myself. It's called self harm. I, ah, it's hard to explain. But a part of me feels like I deserve pain, deserve to hurt. So when I feel pain, I can focus on that. And the world slows down, and I feel like I can function. It's... peaceful, sort of, I guess." Tony sounded awkward and uncomfortable as he explained the peculiar practice to Winter.

Winter didn't process pain well. He registered it, knew it was there, but it didn't affect him. To him it was no different than pleasure. Just a sensation in his body to be brushed aside. Winter frowned. "I don't understand."

"That's okay. Most people don't. There are a lot of things in the world we don't really understand. It's best to just accept them, and accept that we may never really understand." Tony's smile was small and sad, and it made Winter's chest hurt. Did all people feel physical pain when they were emotionally distraught? Winter filed that question away to ask Tony later.

"You... shouldn't feel pain. Don't deserve it." Winter insisted.

Tony's smile only looked sadder as he shook his head and laughed softly. "You're gonna have a hard time convincing me of that one, Winter." Winter scowled. Then he understood. This must be his mission. His mission was to make Tony happy, and keep Tony safe. Convince Tony that he didn't deserve pain. Tony was good, Winter decided he liked Tony. Winter nodded to himself.

"What's going on in that head of yours, Winter?" Tony asked, an eyebrow raised.

"You are my mission. Keep Tony safe." Winter growled firmly.

Tony actually laughed, and the sound was nice. Winter liked that too. "If you say so, Winter."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I would have this chapter up by today. It may be less than an hour from midnight, but fuck it, it counts. Don't judge me.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awe, this chapter is cute. Almost too cute. Jesus, what put me in such a happy go lucky mood to write this.

Tony was scared shitless. Sitting cross legged in front of him was a mass murderer, someone who probably could kill Tony in over hundred different ways with a blink of an eye. So yeah, Tony figured he had every right to be scared shitless. But at the same time, Winter was like a kid. Didn't understand much about how the world worked, and seemed scared, but curious. Tony had to admit, that was kind of adorable. Yeah, terrifying and adorable. That was how Tony saw Winter.

"So where are we?" Tony asked, looking around.

Winter's eyes flicked around as well, calculating. "Abandoned building." He said gruffly.

Tony groaned. " _ **Great**_. I've seen enough of those to last a lifetime. I'm cold." He whined, visibly pouting.

Winter tilted his head to the side slightly, then picked up Tony (who may or may not have squeaked in surprise) and situated Tony into his lap, then began rubbing Tony's fingers gently. "Excessive blood loss. Chances of hypothermia high." Winter mumbled, sounding robotic. Tony wouldn't admit to snuggling into Winter for warmth.

"Ah." Tony squeaked out. "You're fucking warm. Like, is that a super soldier thing? You're incapable of getting cold?" He asked, rhetorically.

"I get cold." Winter mumbled. "I... register cold, but don't experience it, like regular people." Winter whispered looking sad, his voice pained.

Tony squirmed and wiggled around until he could turn his head to face Winter while still sitting in the man's lap. He hoped to god that he wasn't crossing a line when he gently reached up and cupped Winter's jaw. "Hey, look at me. No, you're not normal. I won't try to say you are. But you're still human. Maybe you don't really feel cold or other sensations, but you still feel the more important things, like emotions. You must at least somewhat like me, considering you haven't shot me yet." Tony offered a crooked smile. "So maybe you don't get cold, but you still know how to feel. Maybe you don't understand it, but that's okay. No one really does." Tony finished his speech, feeling satisfied that he was being all deep and inspiring.

A smile flickered across Winter's features. "I like you." He said softly.

Tony smiled. "I like you too, big guy."

Winter's eyes flickered with emotion, and his facial expression changed a few times, making Tony raise an eyebrow slightly. "You're pretty." Winter finally said, his cheeks flushed red. Tony felt himself blush as well.

"Well you aren't bad looking yourself." Tony teased. A ghost of a shy smile graced Winter's face.

"Tony?" Winter whispered, his expression looking slightly frightful.

"Yeah?" Tony raised his eyebrows.

"Why do I want to kiss you?" Winter asked, his voice dead serious, head tilted to the side.

Tony blinked. Well he wasn't expecting  _ **that**_. He searched for an answer in his head, opening and closing his mouth stupidly. "Because you, ah, you like me. But not in a regular 'friend' like way, but in... more of a romantic way." Tony tried to explain slowly, trying to be patient and have his brain  _ **not**_  blank out.

"Do you like me romantically?" Winter asked.

Tony closed his eyes. He could do this. He had faced off big HYDRA people with guns. He could do feelings. He could totally do this. "Winter... I'm not saying I don't, I'm saying... that well, I've known you less than twenty four hours. And you're new to all of this stuff, and I don't want you to rush through it or fall for the first person who helps you, even if it's just me. So I think you should try to take your feelings slowly, okay? There are a lot of people worth falling for better than me." He forced out, giving a tight smile.

Winter frowned. "Didn't answer my question." He seemed to think for a moment. "You're wrong. You're a good person. Don't want anyone else. I like Tony." Winter insisted, scowling.

"Fine. To answer your question, I guess I do. But I'm young, and no one really shows much real interest in me, so I'm likely to fall for anyone who genuinely likes me. So I'm no better at my feelings than you are." Tony said.

Winter leaned forward. "Can I kiss you?" He said, ignoring most of what Tony said.

"Well, I mean, I would like it, but you probably shouldn't. You deserve better." Tony repeated, blushing again.

Winter seemed to take that as a yes, or at least whatever translated as a yes in his head, and dipped his head forward to give Tony a tentative kiss. Granted, Tony was seventeen and the son of a playboy, so it naturally wasn't his first kiss, and considering Winter didn't have much experience, wasn't his best kiss either. But, it was still a fantastic kiss. The type of kiss that instead of making his groin stir, it make his toes tingle and his chest warm. Tony smiled when they pulled away.

Winter smiled, and while he looked like Bucky when he did, there was still something about him that made it clear to Tony that it was Winter, not Bucky in control. Tony smiled back shyly.

"This is nice. Could almost make a guy forget he's being hunted by HYDRA." Tony joked, but Winter tensed at the H-word. "Hey, just a joke, big guy, it's okay." Tony soothed. Winter relaxed a bit.

"Need to stay on the move. Avoid them." Winter decided, standing up. Tony squeaked with surprise when Winter picked Tony up, holding the teen with one arm as though it were nothing.

"Where do you suggest, Winter?" Tony asked. Winter grabbed Tony's bag, sweeping the first aid kit back into it then throwing it over his shoulder.

"Anywhere but here." Winter growled. "Car is trackable. Need a new one." He said as he started to carry Tony out of the building.

Tony groaned. "Oh come on, does that mean we have to steal another car? This'll be like, the third one, and I haven't even been in Russia for a week." Tony complained.

Winter gave him a hard glare. "Need to get out of Russia." Winter mumbled, seeming to be talking to himself.

Tony snorted. "Then get me a plane." He said sarcastically.

Winter seemed to be actually considering it. "You fly a plane?" He asked.

Tony stared at him as Winter went on a hunt for an unoccupied car. "Winter, I wasn't serious. I mean yes, I can fly a jet, but we aren't stealing a plane." Tony said firmly. He was slightly concerned by Winter ignoring him. 

Winter found a car and reached forward to rip the door off.

"Hey hey hey!" Tony stopped him. "Driving down the road with the doors ripped off is a bit suspicious, Winter. Let me jimmy the lock." Tony said quickly. Winter scowled, but set Tony down. Tony picked the lock, and hotwired the car in less than five minutes. He climbed over to the passenger side, wincing when he put too much weight on his shot arm. 

Winter got in and started the car, his gaze lingering on Tony. "You okay?" 

Tony nodded, forcing a smile. "Never better. Let's go. Off to... somewhere, I guess. Vámonos."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Winter gets his first kiss. Okay, it's adorable. Also sorry this chapter is kind of short, but it has fluff to make up for it.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *crawls out of grave* *spits up dirt*  
> I'm back! Well, shit. This took FOREVER. Fuck life. First writer's block, then I finally was like 'I GOT IT' and then life was like 'fuck you =D' and shit hit the fan. Long story short, I wanted this done on Monday, then I ended up busy until now. Classes start in less than a week, so updates may be slower, especially considering I'm applying for a job as well. Hopefully once a week, on Thursdays maybe, this'll be updated. Until then, *rereads what I wrote* *ducks* don't kill me.

Tony sat quietly in the car as Winter drove, neither of them really having a destination. Tony looked out the window at the passing cities and towns, blanketed with snow. Was it always snowing in Russia? Not like Tony knew. All he knew was that he was cold, and he wished he could be back in the States.

Winter cried out in pain, almost swerving off the road. Tony jumped and tense, looking around. He frowned when he saw no immediate danger.

"Winter?" Tony questioned, studying the pained man.

"James. Trying to take control." Winter growled, rubbing his head.

"Pull over." Tony ordered. Winter ignored him. "Winter, pull  _ **over**_!" Tony snapped. This time, the man listened, and stopped the car at the side of the road.

Winter clutched his head, doing a mixture of growling and whimpering. He started mumbling in Russian, sounding almost afraid.

Tony touched his arm. "Winter, hey, look at me." Tony said in a smooth voice, trying to keep his control.  Winter slowly looked at Tony, his eyes wide with fear. "Hey, Winter, breath. Can you breath for me? Just relax, it's okay." Tony soothed, rubbing Winter's arm.

"James will take control." Winter growled, refusing to relax.

"That's okay. You've done all the hard work, and you did such a good job. Let Bucky out, okay? He deserves to have a turn too. Let him do some of the hard work." Tony whispered, keeping his voice soft and gentle.

"I'm afraid." Winter whimpered.

"Of what?" Tony asked softly.

Winter let out another painful sound. "Not being able to come back." Winter admitted.

Tony sighed. "Winter, I promise you'll come back. You and Bucky will share your body, and you'll both have your turns, I promise. But for now, let Bucky have his turn, okay?" Tony persuaded.

Winter stared at him. "See Tony again?" He asked desperately.

"Yes, you'll see me again, I promise." Tony whispered, rubbing his arm.

Winter let out a sigh, and slowly relaxed his body. There was a moment of twitching, followed by extensive cussing in a Brooklyn accent.

"What the fucking hell? Where, where are we?" Bucky demanded, once he caught sight of Tony.

Tony looked around. "A car?" Bucky glared at him. "A car in Russia?" The glare didn't falter. "Okay, that's seriously all I got." Tony shrugged, holding up his hands in defense.

Bucky sighed, rubbing his temples. "What happened?" He asked quietly.

"Your alter ego made a visit." Tony supplied.

Bucky arched an eyebrow. "What?"

"The Winter Soldier? Well, I kinda started calling him Winter, because 'The Winter Soldier' is a bit of a mouthful." Tony explained.

Bucky blinked. "He... he can come out? Without the codewords?" He asked quietly.

Tony nodded. "Well, I think you forced him out. We got ambushed, and some HYDRA dick started the codewords. He didn't finish, I blasted him through a wall, but when you came back up, you were Winter."

"He didn't try to kill you?" BUcky said incredulously.

"Well... he sort of pointed a gun at me and thought about it, but he also bandaged my arm and probably saved my life, so I guess it's a give and take thing." Tony said nonchalantly.

"Oh." Bucky said dumbly.

"So... you don't remember a thing?" Tony asked. "Not even like glimpses?"

Bucky shook his head. "Last thing I remember is HYDRA in the hotel. It's like I was just teleported here, it doesn't even feel like there's a gap." Bucky admitted. Tony resisted the urge to purse his lips. That means Bucky didn't know Tony kissed Winter. Tony didn't know how he felt about that, or whether it was a good or bad thing. For now, Tony had to remind himself that Winter and Bucky were two different people, and he had to differentiate his feelings for the two, like any other two people.

Tony faked a smile, hoping his practice of having to do it for the cameras was good enough for fooling Bucky. "Well don't worry Terminator, you didn't miss anything big. Winter killed a shit ton of HYDRA dicks, found some abandoned building, bandaged my shot arm, and then hijacked this car with no real destination. Then he started having headaches and freaking out and bam, suddenly it was you." Tony glossed over too many details, but he knew it was for the best.

Bucky considered it for a moment. "That makes sense." He paused, thinking. "Does... does this mean that Winter can take control? Whenever?" Bucky sounded slightly panicked.

Tony frowned. He had meant his promise to Winter, but at the same time, didn't want to freak Bucky out. "I... I think he has the ability to, but it's still your head. You... you may have to get used to sharing your time out." Tony said carefully.

"I don't want a mass murderer in control of my body." Bucky ground out.

Tony sighed. "He's really not, though. He's like a kid. Doesn't understand much, confused, and scared. He's alone. I'm trying to be nice to him, and he's just not a bad guy. If you met him, you wouldn't even know he was a killer. You'd think he was a kid trapped in your body." Tony tried to explain, trying to make Bucky a bit more comfortable with the idea of Winter.

Bucky only scowled. "I just don't fucking like it. I can hear his voice in my head everytime I fight, telling me what to do. I can hear him warning me everytime he thinks I make a stupid decision. It's hard to accept that the voice in my head, is just a kid." Bucky snarled.

"I don't know what you want me to say, Buck. I can't change it. The best you can do is accept it." Tony said softly.

"How would you fucking feel if there was a killer in your head?!" Bucky snapped, glaring at Tony.

Tony flinched, feeling his head speed up. "Bucky, I'm  _ **sorry**_. I don't understand, I won't pretend I do. I'm just trying to  _ **help**_." Tony said, fighting to keep his voice even. 

" _ **Fuck**_  your help! Fuck all of this!" Bucky screamed, digging his fingernails into his own skin. "I should've fucking died! When I fell, I should've  _ **died**_!"

Tony shrunk in on himself. "I'm sorry." He said softly, his voice barely audible. " _Mi dispiace_." (I'm sorry)

Bucky finally looked at Tony, and calmed down. "Tony? Are you alright?" Bucky asked, his voice gentler.

" _S-sto bene_." (I'm fine) Tony mumbled.

" _Tony, guarda me. Non ti farò del male. Mi dispiace per urlare. Non è colpa tua._ " (Tony, look at me. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm sorry for yelling. It's not your fault.) Bucky said, his voice gentle and soothing.

Tony slowly looked at Bucky, calming his own breathing. " _Mi dispiace_." (I'm sorry.)

Bucky opened his mouth to say something, but something slammed into their car. Tony screamed as it tumbled down into a snowbank, the car spinning around.

"Bucky!" Tony screamed. Had it not been a dire situation, Tony would've made a joke about how cliche it was, but right now, he had more pressing matters.

" _желание_!" A voice shouted. 

Tony widened his eyes. "Not again, not again, not again. Bucky, cover your damned ears!" Tony shouted as he pushed his door open. The car was now upside down, and it took awkward crawling and maneuvering to get himself out.

" _ржавый! семнадцать_!"

"No no no no, Bucky come  _ **on**_! We need to move!" Tony grabbed Bucky's arm, dragging the man out of the car. Bucky was paralyzed with fear, but a few hard yanks had him free. Adrenaline, Tony thought in the back of his head.

Tony started to force Bucky away, but he was grabbed by HYDRA agents. He screamed, fighting. They had his arms, and he couldn't get any of his tech. His watch was still in Bucky's pocket.

" _рассвет! печь! девять_!"

They were halfway through. Tony kept kicking and screaming, trying to grab one of the agent's gun. He thanked god he was small and agile, able to wiggle out of people's grip.

" _доброкачественный! возвращение на родину! один_!"

Tony fought, but couldn't help but watch in horror as Bucky kept shaking, looking terrified. Tony wanted so desperately to break free and run over to him, cover his ears, hold him, comfort him.

" _грузовой вагон_!"

Bucky froze, his expression going blank. Tony stared in horror. He stopped struggling.  His entire focus was on Bucky, heart roaring in his ears, unable to hear anything else.

"Soldier?"

Bucky pushed himself to his feet, his expression still terrifyingly blank. " _Готов к выполнению_." (Ready to comply)

Tony felt tears starting to fall. He didn't resist when a needle sank into his neck. The last thing he saw before darkness took over his vision was Bucky, ready to comply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's writing style: Attack from HYDRA. Escape. Attack. Escape. Attack. CAPTURE. I'm evil. And repetitive. Don't worry. It'll get better.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fucking hell. I was going to write this on Thursday, then got hit with a shit storm. But on the bright side, I had a bit more time to plan this out, and changed my plans for this chapter a bit, but I like this version better. And trust me, my other version was so much more angsty.  
> For anyone who read the note at the beginning of Chap 1, I am editing it a slight bit, only so that Hulk isn't an Avenger in this universe at this point. Because well, you'll see.

Tony winced, blinking the blur out of his vision. Oh, shit. Well now he wished he hadn't woken up, remembering how he got to where he was.

He glanced around. He had his arms chained above his head, so high he had to stand on his tiptoes to take the pressure off of his aching shoulders. Tony winced. He was cold. He was also missing his shirt, or any top. Well at least that made sense. The room Tony was in was cold and dank, like a typical cell should be. There was only one exit, and it had a guard. Tony squinted. It had  _ **Bucky**_. Still in Winter Soldier mode,  _ **guarding Tony's door**_. HYDRA had a fucking sick sense of humor.

The door opened, and Winter stepped aside to let someone in, a HYDRA agent.

"Mister Stark." He greeted with a shit eating grin. Tony glowered at him, refusing to answer. "HYDRA is glad to have you in our hands, you have made some things a bit... problematic" The agent's smile twisted sourly.

"Go fuck yourself." Tony snarled. A fist connected with his jaw. Tony swore under his breath, tasting blood in his mouth.

"We're going to have to teach you proper respect when we break you." The agent mused. "HYDRA has decided that you are going to be put through a program very similar to Project Winter Soldier, however you'll be the asset's assistant." He smiled cruelly.

Tony balled up his fists. "Like hell I will. You're insane if you think you'll be able to keep me caged here like an animal." He growled.

The agent laughed. "The Winter Soldier said similar things when he was first brought to HYDRA, and look where he is now." He gestured. "However, HYDRA does recognize that you are rather resourceful." He pulled out a gun and shot Tony in the kneecap. Tony screamed. "As you can see, we're taking proper measures to prevent your escape." He smiled darkly and the gun was pressed against Tony's stomach. "If you do not survive this until a doctor comes, then no matter, it just means you aren't strong enough for HYDRA." He shrugged, and pulled the trigger again. Tony didn't scream, his mouth only fell open with shock. He was punched in his ribcage, making him groan. "Hail HYDRA." The agent left.

Tony was limp in the chains, watching blood paint his stomach and hips. He hazily looked up at Winter. "Winter." He called out weakly. The Soldier turned and faced him, but his expression was vacant. Tony winced in pain. "Winter, please. Do you remember me? Tony, right? Come on Winter, you have to snap out of this." Tony begged. Winter tilted his head to the side, and something flickered in his eyes, but he didn't move. "Winter, remember -nngh- remember when you kissed me? When you bandaged my arm? Come on, I know you have it in you, you can remember me." Tony coaxed. Winter groaned, and clutched his head, then he looked back at Tony. His eyes went wide.

"Tony." He strangled out. 

"Yeah, hi." Tony said, smiling.

Winter immediately moved, breaking the cuffs off of Tony's wrists, and catching Tony when he fell. "You're hurt." Winter said, alarmed. "Don't know how to fix this." He said, running his fingers over Tony's stomach.

"It's okay. Just get us out of here, then we can find a doctor, okay?" Tony asked, voice strained. Winter slowly nodded, and picked Tony up bridal style. He kicked down the door, and Tony could barely focus as they moved down hallways quickly.

Once they were back outside, Tony vaguely felt himself being shoved into a car. "Winter... where are we going?" He mumbled, his vision blurring.

"Hospital." Winter ground out.

Tony shook his head. They couldn't go there, HYDRA would know to look there first, and if someone recognized Tony, it'd be disastrous. He snapped his eyes open. "No, Winter! I have a better idea." Tony said more clearly, and Winter glanced over at him. "There's this guy, a doctor that SHIELD keeps tabs on. He travels around, but he was last in Russia. If he's still here, I remember the coordinates."

 

* * *

 

Bruce quietly organized his tools. He was in a low profile, low rent apartment. He only planned to be in Russia for a few more weeks, before moving again. There were more places that he could go to that would need his help, and besides, it'd keep the government off his tail.

Granted, he wished he didn't have to do this, live on the run. But it was so much better than the alternative. Letting the government lock him up and use him as a weapon they didn't even know the full capacity of. Bruce shuddered at the thought.

The room was peacefully silent, so when there was a bang of the door being kicked down, Bruce wasn't ashamed that he screamed a little.  _In and out. In and out._  He reminded himself. He couldn't freak out, he didn't want a visit from The Other Guy. But having someone break in wasn't good. It was bad. Very bad.Was it the government? Had Ross found him? Was SHIELD going to badger him again?

Bruce frowned when a guy, big and muscular, wearing combat clothing, stormed in carrying a teenager. The guy plunked the teen down on Bruce's table. Bruce winced. The kid had a swollen jaw, bruising ribs, and what looked like gunshots in his kneecap and stomach, and he looked barely conscious.

"Fix him." The guy growled, glaring at Bruce.

"Winter, be nice." The boy slurred, sounding half delirious. Bruce frowned, looking closer at the mangled and ragged boy. Fucking christ, was that Tony Stark? Bruce prayed to god it wasn't Tony Stark.

Bruce stared at them. "Who are you? You can't just-" He started, trying to keeping himself calm.  _In and out._

" _ **Fix. Him**_." The guy repeated, this time pulling out a gun and pointing it at Bruce's head. Bruce closed his eyes for a moment.  _In and out_.

Bruce looked down at the boy. He knew this was wrong on so many levels, but still. He was a doctor, and even if he wasn't a surgeon -which was clearly what the kid needed- it was still his duty to help. And besides, he had a gun pointed at his head by a guy with a  _ **metal arm**_. It wasn't like he really had a choice. Bruce drew in a deep breath. "Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A wild Bruce Banner is spotted in it's natural habitat. In all honesty, one can get a bit sick of having only two characters to work with, and I didn't want this to get boring. And besides, Bruce is under appreciated in fanfic anyways.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is this? An early update? AND a chapter twice as long as my usual ones? *looks around suspiciously* *whispers* Do these things even exist?  
> Bitch, they do now. I have a wicked headache, but hey, I got this written. So yay.
> 
> Also, it is to be noted, the first chunk of this chapter is chronologically taking place at the same exact time as everything else, but is just a switch in POV to Natasha, bringing us back to SHIELD. I did this to A, explore Steve's psyche a bit, and B, foreshadow just a wee bit. *wink wink* One would almost think I'm assembling something.... or am I? Mwahaha, wherever you think this story is going, be prepared, I'm the queen of plot twists. I like keeping all of you on your toes. ;)  
> Anyhow, after Natasha POV, it flips back to Bruce and picks up where Chap 10 left off.

Natasha watched Steve pace in tight circles again and again, her lips pursed.

"What if it was something I said?" Steve worried. "I mean everyone is worried he was kidnapped, but they haven't even gotten a ransom note. He must've run away, right?" Steve asked, running a hand through his disheveled hair.

Natasha tilted her head to the side. "It's a plausible theory." She said cryptically.

Steve sighed. "I should've _ **said**_ something, Nat. I could've made SHIELD control Howard so he didn't abuse his son!  Nat, that's not  _ **right**_! Howard shouldn't have treated Tony like that!" He exclaimed angrily.

"Steve, even if you said something, you of all people have to realize it wouldn't have done a thing." Natasha said soothingly. "He's Howard Stark, he  _ **founded**_  SHIELD. They wouldn't take your word over his, Captain America or not. There's nothing you could've done." She reminded him gently.

"I could've _ **tried**_." Steve said with dejection. "It's my fault, isn't it? Howard's been abusing him for years, but the day _ **I**_ say something he disappears. I pushed him over the edge." Steve said, with so much remorse and guilt it was heartbreaking. "I just wanted to help the kid, Nat."

" _ **Steven**_." Natasha said firmly. "This isn't your fault. You weren't the one who abused Tony. You don't know what else was going on in Tony's life, what could've potentially pushed him over the edge. And this is all assuming he ran away." She reminded him. 

"Where would you go?" Steve inquired. "If you were a seventeen year old genius kid? Where would you run to?" He wondered.

Natasha shrugged. "Hard to say." She studied Steve. "You should ask Fury for some time off. You don't have your head in the right place. You can offer your help in finding the Stark kid, but for now, stay out of the field, Steve." She ordered, giving him a pointed look.

Steve looked like he wanted to fight it, but relented. "Alright. Thank you for the advice, Nat." He smiled wryly, then left.

Natasha sighed. She understood how Steve felt. In his position, she'd feel the same. He tries to help Tony, and the same day the kid goes missing. If Natasha didn't know the full story, she would've assumed that was the cause. But for better or worse, she knew the full story.

Natasha knew about Tony's phone call with Colonel Rhodes hours before he was found missing, and how Colonel Rhodes blamed himself for SHIELD's actions. But Colonel Rhodes, for as good an agent he was, he wasn't considering every angle. Tony knew Bucky Barnes was the Winter Soldier. Natasha of course had known that, and it killed her not telling Steve, but she was under orders. And she understood why Steve couldn't know. He would go ballistic, and it could compromise him. And besides, Natasha just didn't have the heart to tell Steve his best friend had been tortured, brainwashed, and forced to kill by the one thing Steve hated more than anything.

Anyhow, the Winter Soldier's identity aside, Tony knew it, and was upset by knowing that SHIELD was taking no action about it. He had been described as an implusive, but brilliant teeanger. And, despite what she told Steve, Natasha knew exactly what she would've done in Tony's place. She would've gone to Russia and found the Winter Soldier. And she would bet anything that's what Tony had done.

Natasha stood up, cracking her neck. She may be a master assassin, raised in the Red Room, but even she wasn't going to let a teenager take on HYDRA alone. Especially when Tony was doing it for all the right reasons. And besides, she admired someone who had enough spunk to do something that wild. She pursed her lips. It probably wouldn't be hard to track the kid. She would have to tell Clint she was leaving, and leave him for dealing with alibis. She could have a bag packed within the hour. Be in Russia within the day, and hopefully track the kid before tomorrow. She just prayed she wouldn't find a dead body.

 

* * *

 

Bruce drew in a deep breath, and took a closer look at the teenager on his coffee table. The poor kid was breathing shallowly, and literally bleeding to death. Bruce shook his head, with his current blood loss, as well as taking into account blood loss that would occur when Bruce was tending to him, the kid wouldn't make it without a transfusion.

"Do you know his blood type?" Bruce asked as calmly as he could manage. The guy only stared blankly at him. Bruce sighed with impatience. "He has a lot of blood loss, and if he doesn't get more blood in his system, he will die." The guy growled and glowered at the prospect. "I can't give him my blood, because my blood has gamma radiation and could seriously hurt his system. Right now, you're the only current donor, so I'm going to have to ask you to put the gun down and get over here so I can give the kid blood." Bruce explained. The guy cocked his head to the side, but slid the gun away and walked towards Bruce, baring his flesh arm.

Bruce grabbed a blood transfusion kit and made quick work ripping it open. Thankfully the guy was muscular and his veins stood out "Hold still." Bruce advised, and plunged a needle into the guy's arm. Finding the kid's vien proved to be a bit more difficult, but Bruce eventually located it, and pressed the needle under the now unconscious teen's skin. Red began to fill the tubes, out one body and into another. "Let me know if you get light headed. I don't need two patients on my hands." Bruce said firmly, and focused on the kid's wounds. He pursed his lips. "I'm going to need your help." The guy glanced at him. "Take this," Bruce handed him a wad of gauze. "and press it against his knee wound to staunch the blood flow while I focus on his stomach." Bruce ordered. The guy complied easily, outstretching his right arm to keep the tubes connected and using his metal left hand to press the gauze to the kids' knee.

Bruce focused on the stomach wound, pressing down gently around it. He needed an x-ray, needed to see what was going on inside the kid's body. No doctor, especially one who wasn't a trained surgeon, should cut without knowing what they were doing. If he did, he was just as much a risk to the kid as the bullet was. But what other choice did Bruce have? He drew in a deep breath and got to work. 

 

* * *

 

Bruce collapsed into a chair, exhausted. He was coated with blood, and had spent over an hour operating on the kid, and god help him, he had actually succeeded. The kid was still unconscious, but breathing steadily and in stable condition. The bullet had hit his appendix, thank god. The one in his kneecap had also done minimal damage, and the kid would be able to walk in a few months, with physical therapy. All things considered, the kid was a lucky son of a bitch.

Bruce warily glanced up at his other companion. The guy had followed Bruce's orders exactly while he worked on Tony, and had given the kid more blood than should be humanly possible. Bruce didn't know whether he should be impressed or terrified.

"Ah!" The guy grunted, and fell against the wall, clutching his head in pain.

"Are you okay? What hurts?" Bruce asked, jumping to his feet. He had forgotten his wariness, and now his only focus on another patient.

"Head..." The guy grunted. "Don't... want to lose control..." He groaned, shaking with exertion.

Bruce's eyes widened with alarm. He knew what 'losing control' could entail. "Hey, deep breaths, relax." Bruce soothed, trying to keep his own calm.  _In and out._

"Ah!" The guy let out a pained shout, then slumped over, falling to the ground. Bruce crouched over him, worried. The looked guy looked back up at Bruce, but with a completely different expression, one of confusion and fear.

"Are you alri-" Bruce tried to say, but then he was airborne, and crashed into a wall. The guy had just  _ **thrown**_  him across the room.  _In and out. In and out_. Bruce slowly pushed himself to his feet. "You _ **really**_  shouldn't do that again. I'm warning you for your own safety." Bruce said, almost pleading. He was holding on with barely a few shreds. _In and out._ Bruce slowly regained control.  _In and out._

"Your eyes were just glowing green." The guy said, sounding confused. Bruce frowned. His voice and tone sounded vastly different, like one of those sci-fi scenes where someone's body was being controlled by another.

"Trust me, you do not  _ **ever**_ want my eyes to glow green. Because what comes after, if I can't keep control, is something no one should see." Bruce warned.

The guy frowned. "I won't ask." He looked around, then his eyes focused on the kid, and he looked horrified. "Tony!" He rushed over to the table. So it was Tony Stark.  _Great._ The guy looked back up at Bruce. "What the hell happened?" He demanded angrily.

"You tell me!" Bruce snapped, then closed his eyes and took a deep breath. In and out. "Look, all I know is you kicked down my door carrying him in, and held a gun to my head and demanded I fix him. I don't know who you are or how you find me, but I don't appreciate high stress situations. They tend to bring out my bad side." Bruce said, pun completely intended.

The guy stared at the kid for a moment. "Great." He said finally.

Bruce studied him curiously. "Do you have a form of Multiple Personality Disorder?" He asked. Bruce wasn't that kind of doctor, but that seemed to be the only only reasonable explanation. But then again, in this world, what was reasonable?

The guy glowered at him. "No." Then he frowned. "Well, not technically. I'm not fuckin' crazy. It's not like that." He insisted. Bruce arched an eyebrow. The guy sighed. "Look, I was brainwashed for seventy years, and it formed an alternate... ego I guess, in my head. Tony calls him Winter, HYDRA calls him The Winter Soldier. Either way, he's me, I guess. But he's not. I don't know how to explain it." His voice was tight with frustration.

"The Winter Soldier?" Bruce asked quietly. "I thought that was a myth." He muttered.

"You just met him. Trust me, he's not a myth. I have him living in my head." The guy snapped. 

Bruce nodded slowly. "I see. And you are...?" Bruce prompted.

"Bucky. Bucky Barnes. That's Tony Stark." He pointed to the kid.

"Yeah I noticed." Bruce mumbled, staring at the teen. Then it clicked and his eyes widened comically. "You said seventy years?" Bucky nodded. "Fucking Christ, tell me you're not Sergeant James Barnes from World War Two? The one who was Captain America's sidekick?" He asked quietly.

Bucky narrowed his eyes. "Says who I was Stevie's sidekick? That damned punk gets shot with some super juice and suddenly  _ **I'm**_  the sidekick? The one who kept his stupid ass alive while he was a scraggly thing from Brooklyn that could get sick just looking at a germ? I'm that punk's  _ **sidekick**_?!" Bucky exclaimed. "He better not be tellin' people that. Or I'm gonna beat him with that stupid shield of his. Sidekick, sidekick my ass." He grumbled. Bruce couldn't help but chuckle.

"You may not want to read any of the Captain America comics released during the 40s and 50s. You're... well, you're depicted as a teenager, with your own... costume. You even have a mask." Bruce said, containing his laughter. Bucky looked horrified at the thought.

"Well that does it." Bucky said flatly. "I  _ **am**_  gonna beat that punk's ass."

Bruce laughed. "It wasn't really his fault. He was dead -well, assumed dead- when they were written." He shrugged. Bruce thought a moment. "But on a more serious note, you're honored as a hero. There are memorial walls dedicated to you in museums. You're a hero, in everyone's eyes." Bruce said seriously, with a small smile.

Bucky looked away. "Well considering I spent the past seventy years killing for the people I fought against in the war, I sure as hell I don't see myself as a hero." He said coldly. "I'm a monster." He sounded almost pained, with his fists balled at his sides.

Bruce felt a pang of sympathy. "You didn't have a choice. Neither did, ah, Winter. You can't change the past. It is what it is." He said sadly. Bucky only focused on Tony's form. "I'm Doctor Bruce Banner, by the way." He introduced.

Bucky glanced up at him. "Nice to meet you, Doctor Banner." He said politely, with a drawl that screamed Brooklyn and vintage.

"Considering I had my hands in your friend's stomach, I think you can call me Bruce." Bruce smiled.

"Whatever you say, Doc." Bucky said, with a slight grin. He glanced back down at Tony. "I guess we're gonna have to wait for him to wake up to fill in the details."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhangers are the only real way to end chapters. Also, I can't just ignore how Bucky would react to knowing he was seen as Cap's 'sidekick'. Because that would be wrong. Also we're keeping up the wall throwing motif, because I like testing Brucie-bear.
> 
> Also, if you want a teensy spoiler.... one should know this author hardcore ships Brutasha/Hulkwidow. So if that relationship may or may not appear as a side ship... we'll have to wait and see ;)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, hello, yes, I'm not dead. It's been almost a month, holy shit. But I am not dead! And I have an update! Yay!  
> Okay, let's get a bit serious for a moment. As yall know, it's been a month since I last updated. Anyone following me in general knows my writing in a while has slowed a bit. And I have a reason. No, not some bullshit funny excuse, an actual reason.  
> I'm sick. Like... not flu or cold sick, seriously sick. Not life threateningly, but I miss a lot of school for it (I haven't gone a full week of school this entire year, so far), I see a doctor at least every two weeks, I'm on at least four different medications, and I may need a surgery later this year. It'll be my third surgery. This year. I don't want to go into details or say specifically what I have because I don't want to bother yall with details, but I have been getting a bit worse, so I wanted to clear the air as to why my updates aren't what I wish they could be. Basically, your grandma is probably in better health than I am, and I'm a fricking teenager. So, this is going to slow to about an update a month, though I'll try to get one out every two weeks. I don't want to push this aside, because writing is a real passion, and this fic has gained an amazing following. So I promise I'll finish it, I just need time.  
> Alright, I'll get off the soap box, yall can read the shit now.

Tony groaned, shielding his eyes from a bright light above his head. "Am I dead?" Tony mumbled, trying to sit up. "Nevermind, even **_death_** shouldn't hurt this much." He hissed as a fire spread from... well, everywhere across his body, flames of pain licking across his skin.

 

"Jesus kid, slow down. You're gonna hurt yourself." A pair of arms gently wrapped around Tony and sat him up.

 

"Bucky?" Tony muttered, his eyes focusing on the concerned man in front of him. "Oh, hey, you're back." He noted when Tony realized it was definitely Bucky in front of him. 

 

Bucky rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I'm back. And I want to know what the hell is going on, Tony." His voice was a firm prompt. "So does he." Bucky jerked his head over to Doctor Bruce Banner, standing by as well.

 

"Oh, hi. I'm a huge fan. Your work is unparalleled. I'm also a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster." Tony smiled cheerfully.

 

"Thanks." Bruce forced out.

 

Tony tried to jump down from the table, but groaned and almost fell to the floor. Bucky caught him and set him back on the table. “Ow, bad idea. Very bad idea.” He groaned.

 

“Since I’ve met you, almost everything you’ve done was a bad idea.” Bucky grumbled under his breath.

 

Tony grinned. “It’s my specialty.”

 

“Okay the small talk is nice, but can we please talk about why you’re here? Or how you found me?” Bruce cut in, his voice strained.

 

Tony made a face. “You’re on SHIELD files, you know. They track you, keep tabs on you at all times.” He shrugged. “And their systems lack, well, everything. I could hack into them when I was twelve.”

 

“You’re a genius. I don’t think judging things off of what you could do when you were twelve is good gouge of anything.” Bucky deadpanned.

 

“Well damn, ** _you’re_** in a bad mood.” Tony muttered.

 

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I’m in a fucking bad mood. I keep losing control of my own head, every time I come back you’re in worse health, and the worst part is this is the best I’ve probably been in seventy years. I’m allowed to have some self pity.” He spat.

 

Tony flinched. “I’m sorry.” He said softly, subconsciously scooting away from Bucky. If Bucky or Bruce noticed Tony’s skittish, they didn’t comment on it. “Look what happened was, we were driving, then got ambushed by HYDRA, they activated your codewords, knocked me out, I woke up in a jail cell with Winter guarding my fucking cell, got shot twice by some asshole, and then was able to get Winter back in his right mind, and told him where to find Dr. Banner because I figured hospitals were a bad idea.” He glanced over to Bruce. “I’m really sorry for dragging you into this, I didn’t know what else to do.” Tony felt his vigor and confidence draining from him. He felt so very small, and in over his head. Not for the first time, he thought that there was no way in hell he was going to make it out of any of this alive.

 

“It’s alright.” Bruce sighed. “Nothing can change it now. Call me Bruce.” He offered a strained smile.

 

“So, what now?” Bucky asked, folding his arms.

 

Tony held his arms out as an indication for Bucky to pick him up. “Now we get moving. Come on, gimme a lift, Buckeroo.”

 

“Wait.” Bruce sighed. “You’re clearly not doing too well of a job avoiding HYDRA. You’ve already made me a target as it is. I know how to avoid people, a bit more than I’d like to. Let me help. I have money, I can help you guys keep moving.” He offered. 

 

“Seriously?” Tony asked, incredulous.

 

Bruce shrugged. “It can be a bit lonely, I guess.”

 

“How the hell are we supposed to trust you?” Bucky demanded.

 

Tony rolled his eyes. “Barnes And Noble, this guy is harmless. In his current form. You trusted some kid, you can trust the nice scientist. Now pick me up and Vamanos, mi amigo.”

 

Bucky hesitated, but groaned, cussing under his breath as he picked up Tony. “Why do I listen to you?” Bucky grumbled. “You get me into more trouble than Stevie did.”

 

“Because I saved your life. I’m your knight in shining armor.” Tony said, shrugging.

 

Bucky’s gaze was unamused. “ _ **You’re** _ the knight.” He repeated.

 

“Yep.” Tony popped the ‘p’.

 

While the spoke, Bruce finished packing his things until he only had two bags. He glanced back to the pair, then focused on Tony, frowning. “Your jaw is healing remarkably fast. The bruise is almost gone.” He noticed.

 

Tony’s hand flew up and he gently ran his fingertips over his own jawline. “Shit. I’m supposed to be the normal one here, what the fuck?” He whined.

 

“Bucky, you have a version of the super soldier serum, right?” Bruce asked slowly.

 

Bucky nodded. “I think so, why?”

 

Bruce stared at Tony thoughtfully. “I gave Tony a blood transfusion of your blood. If you have enhanced healing, your blood may be stimulating his to have the same effects on his body. There could be other lingering effects of the traces of serum inside of Tony.” He mused, looking deep in thought.

 

“Nothing bad, right?” Tony said, his mind too swamped with paranoia to stop and consider the science of it.

 

“I don’t know, to be honest. You were given a substantial amount… who knows how big the impact will be, and how long it’ll last. We don’t exactly have the equipment to run tests…” He trailed off, eyebrows drawn together.

 

“Well, what’s done is done.” Tony sighed. “Come on, we should get going.”

 

Bruce nodded in agreement. “We have to avoid national airlines.” He said over his shoulder as they left the apartment, though the kicked down door. “I have a car, but it won’t get us very far, and it shouldn’t, using one vehicle for too long is a bad idea. We can get it to the closest city and work our way from there.” 

 

They followed Bruce’s lead, towards Bruce’s car. None of them expected to see a tall, slender redhead leaning against the car.

 

The woman lifted herself from the car, sliding off her sunglasses and arching an eyebrow at them. Tony’s eyes widened. He knew **_exactly_** who that was.

 

Natasha Romanoff smirked. “Hello, boys.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I'm getting a little OOC here, but it's hard to get personalities and characterization right in AUs. Argh, just fuck me. I need more tea.  
> Also, if this comes out formatted funky with grammar and spelling errors galore, it's because I'm using my school laptop instead of my personal one. I... I kind of broke my personal laptop. And my school can track what I do on this laptop... this wasn't the best idea.

**Author's Note:**

> No, I don't have an update schedule. Yes, I write this at 3 am. Yes, I have the ending for this one figured out, I just have to get there Comment and like, it motivates me.


End file.
